The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein

A tree loved a little boy. The boy would come every day and gather the leaves from the tree. He would use them to form crowns and play king of the forest. He would climb her and swing her from side to side. Sometimes, he would eat the apples on the tree. When he was tired, he would sleep in her shade. He really loved the tree and the tree was happy. The boy grew up as time went on and the tree was alone most of the time. The tree encouraged the grown-up boy to play with her but the boy mentioned that he wanted to buy things and earn money. The tree suggested that the boy sell her apples in the market for money. The boy climbed the tree and plucked all the apples. The tree was happy. It was a long time before the boy (now an adult) came back and the tree was alone. Now, the boy didn’t want to play but wanted to build a house. The tree offered her branches to help build his house. The tree was happy when the boy cut away its branches. The tree was alone for long periods of time. Now, the boy (now an elderly man) wanted to build a boat so that he could sail away. The tree offered her trunk so that he could build his boat. The boy cut down her trunk and the tree was happy. Now that the tree was just a stump, she apologized for not being of any use to the boy anymore. She allowed the boy (now a sickly old man) to rest by sitting on her stump, and the tree was happy.

‘I am sorry. I wish that I could give you something…but I have nothing left. I am just an old stump. I am sorry…Well, an old stump is good for sitting and resting. Come, Boy, sit down. Sit down and rest.’ The Giving Tree

the_giving_tree

Advertisements

Dating Tips 201

LunchClick Starter Kit

Why are you still single? Learn to reflect on yourself. What is the issue you are facing? The top 3 reasons are 1) I haven’t met anyone I want to be involved with; 2) The people I’m interested in are attached, or are not interested in me; 3) I find it hard to meet someone who shares my values or interests. The Angsty Guy is a complain king who likes to whine that no girls are interested in him. The Picky Guy laments that it is difficult to find the girl of his dreams. The Bore does not know how to talk to women. The Guy Who Can’t be Bothered doesn’t put in effort in trying to meet new people. The Timid Guy doesn’t exhibit enough confidence during dates. The Workaholic works all day and doesn’t have time to date. The Mummy’s Boy clings to his parents and relies on them for decision-making. The Cheapskate refuses to pay for the first date. The Bad Boy usually attracts the type of girls who want to hang out with someone ‘cool’ and the relationship will usually not last.

Optimizing Your Online Dating Performance. Ensure that your dating profile is in tip top condition. For profile photos, go for quality over quantity. The photo resolution should be decent. Avoid using selfies as the resolution is lower and the photo might turn out grainy. If you wear little clothing in your display picture, you might attract the wrong sort of girl. It is best to use individual shots as compared to group photos, where the other party needs to guess which is you. Avoid using Photoshop, but using filters to adjust contrast or brightness is alright. Smile in your pictures. Make your occupation sound exciting and interesting. For date ideas, go for something unique. You can state things like ‘Let’s go to a quaint café with awesome atmosphere, and engage in witty banter over a cup of coffee.’ Go ahead and ask her questions. Send a maximum of 3 questions at a go and wait for her reply before sending more. Avoid too serious or personal questions at the start. Be honest when answering questions and don’t be afraid of being judged. Even if her answers are not all good, you might still want to give her a chance and go out with her on a date.

The First Date: Meeting Your Match. It can a bit awkward on the first date but you need to take things easy. When you first see her, compliment her on her attire and clothes etc. It’s better to be overdressed than underdressed and it is important to look good on the date. Maintaining a good conversation is very important and there should not be awkward pauses. You can ask her about her 1) travels; 2) her friends; 3) personality; 4) her favorite place in Singapore (you could suggest that the second date be held there); 5) Share some of secrets or something embarrassing that happened to you. Avoid sharing about your exes, your problems or asking overly prying questions.

online-dating-guide-header-1500x991

 

Review of the Seiko Sumo SBDC001

I purchased this used timepiece in Feb 2016 from a friend after the purchase of my Jean Richard Aeroscope Arsenal F.C. limited edition.

The Seiko Sumo SBDC001 which I purchased was a used Japanese domestic model piece and is part of the Seiko Prospex line of divers. The one I owned did not have the ‘X’ on the dial. The latest model SBDC031 has the ‘X’ on the dial. I was always looking forward to purchase a cheap Seiko which was reliable. The watch is stealthy and comes with an all-black dial and black aluminium bezel. The SBDC001 (45mm case and is 13.5mm thick) uses the workhorse Seiko 6R15 movement, unlike some of the other lower-end Seiko 5s or Turtles. The case shape and finishing is second to none and there are different layers of polish and brushed surfaces on the side of the case. The watch is a simple time only watch with a second hand and a rotating bezel. Seiko is a renowned brand which needs no introduction whatsoever. There is also the blue Sumo nicknamed the ‘Blumo’ (SBDC003). The SBDC005 comes with an orange dial and a rubber strap. There are also various limited edition or special edition Sumos like the one for the 50th anniversary etc. Seiko is also releasing a Seiko Sumo Padi in early 2017. The K series of the same watches are slightly cheaper but are supposedly of poorer built quality.

sumo-2

Seiko movements are reliable and are made in-house. The Seiko 6R15 mechanical movements (50 hour power reserve) runs at 3Hz has been around for ages and keep good time and chronometry. In addition, because they are Japanese movements, they are a lot more affordable. In fact, the 4R36s, 6R15s are comparable to Miyota movements or even Swiss ETAs. There is extensive lume on the SBDC001, comparable to some of Seiko’s other divers. The watch simply glows like a torch at night! This watch is certainly an upgrade from the SKX or even the Tuna/Turtle range, which uses the 7s movement. Seiko watches are good value-for-money and aesthetically pleasing and for good reason.

sumo-1

The main reason why I found it so attractive was the tool-like nature of the watch. My reasons are listed below:

The SBDC001 comes in a stainless steel case. (about 51mm lug-to-lug) and a standard Sumo bracelet (20mm). The lug width on the bracelet seems a little small as the case is indeed very heavy. I would have preferred 22mm lugs. The lug holes makes changing straps a breeze. The case sits nicely on the wrist and is well-built. I have worn the Sumo for extended periods of time and have not felt any wrist fatigue. However, the heavy case and bracelet is something to get used to. However, one could always wear the Sumo with a thick Nato band.

sumo-3

The Seiko Sumo has been a great success and it has a cult following as the case finishing is simply top notch for this price point. It is simply a tool watch which can be abused without the user worrying about it. The dial is largely symmetrical, other than the white date wheel indication at 3 o’clock. The hour markers and minute markers are shaped like broad swords. The dial is pure black, with white fonts and markers. The black bezel is fully marked from 0 to 60 minutes. The all-black look gives the watch a nice tool-like feel, just like Rolex Submariners.

sumo-4

The SBDC001 is a dive watch with 200 meters water resistance and is secured by the screw-down crown at the 4 o’clock position. This watch can certainly be used for sports and for daily use. It will pair well with formal attire, like a suit/blazer or even t-shirts and jeans. I have worn this piece numerous times to work and I have had no trouble with it. Being 13.5mm tall, it might not slide under most shirt-cuffs. I would say that the watch is quite stealthy in nature due to the dull black colour on the dial. The watch does not get as much wrist time as my Ball or Tudor watches as it also costs much less. The 120-click uni-directional bezel is easy to turn and there is little play in it. The bezel also aligns perfectly to the 12 o’clock mark. However, I have read reviews that some bezels might be stiff to turn and might not align perfectly too.

sumo-5

The watch uses the Seiko 6R15 automatic movement, which is hand winding and has hacking capabilities. This a certainly a workhorse movement that is widely used in other Seikos like the famous dress watch Presage range. The movement comes with a 50 hour power reserve when fully wound. I am not used to watches which can’t wind and have to be powered via wrist movements. Hence, this watch suits me more than the SKX range. The automatic movement cannot be seen as there is a closed caseback. The rotor is also very quiet and barely audible. The watch seems to be fairly accurate based on the brief period which I had it with me. Subsequently, I sold this watch and purchased the Seiko Turtle SRP779, which had a Pepsi bezel.

sumo-6

The Sumo SBDC001 has Seiko’s renowned proprietary Hardlex crystal. It gives the watch greater presence and texture, evoking a vintage feel while claiming to be harder than hesalite crystal. Although not as superior to sapphire crystal in terms of scratch resistance properties, it is durable and decent enough. The stainless steel caseback is engraved with the Air Diver logo and has a brushed finish.

sumo-8

Overall, I am impressed by how the watch looks. However, I have issues with the weight of the watch with the standard-fare Seiko bracelet. The Seiko Sumo SBDC001 is a unique entry level dive watch which is durable and can last for ages. It is something that is highly recommended and is much more affordable than Swiss watches. The watch is available in Singapore and retails for SGD 750. You may consider purchasing it online via eBay or Amazon. If you are considering an entry level dive watch, this watch might just be the one for you.

sumo-9

 

Review of the Seiko Padi Turtle SRPA21K1

I purchased this watch in Dec 2016 from Skywatches after the purchase of my Hamilton Pan Europ Automatic H35405741. To be honest, I always wanted this after selling my SRP779 (click here for the review), the Seiko Turtle with the red and blue bezel. This watch has a sunburst blue dial, red markings at the hours track and at the minute hand and is an upgrade over the SRP779. In addition, this is a Special Edition and is a collaboration with the Professional Association of Dive Instructors (PADI).

padi-3

The Seiko Turtle SRPA21K1 which I purchased was a non-Japanese model and is part of the Seiko Prospex line of divers and has the ‘X’ on the dial. I was always looking forward to purchase a cheap Seiko which was reliable. The blue and red bezel really makes the watch pop and give it a striking appearance. The SRPA21K1 (44.3mm case and is 14mm thick) uses the upgraded Seiko 4R36 movement, unlike some of the other lower-end Seiko 5s. It has the iconic cushion-style case which is reminiscent of the Seiko 6309s in the past. The watch is a simple time only watch with a second hand and a rotating bezel. Seiko is a renowned brand which needs no introduction whatsoever. There are other models of this modern Turtle re-make. These include the SRP773, SRP775, SRP777, SRP779 and also the Seiko Padi Turtles, Green Turtles, Zimbe Turtles etc. Seiko is also releasing a Seiko Samurai Turtle in early 2017. The K series of the same watches are slightly cheaper but are supposedly of poorer built quality.

padi-1

Seiko movements are reliable and are made in-house. The Seiko 4R36 mechanical movements (42 hour power reserve) has been around for ages and keep good time and chronometry. In addition, because they are Japanese movements, they are a lot more affordable. In fact, the 4R36s, 6R15s are comparable to Miyota movements or even Swiss ETAs. There is extensive lume on the SRPPA21K1, comparable to some of Seiko’s other divers. The watch simply glows like a torch at night! This watch is certainly an upgrade from the SKX range, which uses the 7s movement. Seiko watches are good value-for-money and aesthetically pleasing and for good reason.

padi-2

The main reason why I found it so attractive was the tool-like nature of the watch and also because of the strong blue sunburst effect on the dial. My reasons are listed below:

The SRPA21K1 comes in a stainless steel case in a cushion style shape (about 48mm lug-to-lug) and a standard Seiko metal bracelet. I purchased the silicon Z-22 rubber strap (22mm) as it makes the watch feel lighter on the wrist. The rubber strap is extremely durable and supple and is extremely comfortable to wear. The metal keepers on the strap are also brushed and polished, creating a splendid visual effect. I prefer wearing the watch on the rubber strap as compared to the standard Seiko metal bracelet. This watch will also look good on Nato straps etc. The cushion shaped case sits nicely on the wrist and is well-built. I have worn the Turtle for extended periods of time and have not felt any wrist fatigue.

padi-5

The Seiko Turtle re-issue has been a great success as it closely inspired by the original Seiko 6309s. It is simply a tool watch which can be abused without the user worrying about it. The dial is largely symmetrical, other than the day-date indication at 3 o’clock. The hour markers and minute markers are shaped like broad arrows. The dial is pure black, with white fonts and markers. The Pepsi bezel is fully marked from 0 to 60. The Pepsi bezel is certainly popularized by the vintage Rolex GMT watches. For this version, there are also red accents on the hour markers and on the minute hand, giving it a playful look which the SRP779 did not have. The main draw is the blue sunburst dial and the way the dial catches the light is simply mesmerizing.

The SRPA21K1 is a dive watch with 200 meters water resistance and is secured by the screw-down crown. This watch can certainly be used for sports and for daily use. It will pair well with formal attire, like a suit/blazer or even t-shirts and jeans. I have worn this piece numerous times to work and I have had no trouble with it. Being 14mm tall, it might not slide under most shirt-cuffs. I would say that the watch is quite stealthy in nature due to the dull black colour on the dial and strap. The watch does not get as much wrist time as my Ball or Tudor watches as it also costs much less. The uni-directional bezel is easy to turn and there is little play in it. The bezel also aligns perfectly to the 12 o’clock mark. However, I have read reviews that some bezels might be stiff to turn and might not align perfectly too.

padi-6

The watch uses the Seiko 4R36 automatic movement, which is hand winding and has hacking capabilities. This a certainly a workhorse movement that is widely used in other Seikos like the famous Prospex range. The movement comes with a 42 hour power reserve when fully wound. However, I am not used to watches which can’t wind and have to be powered via wrist movements. Hence, this watch suits me more than the SKX range. The automatic movement cannot be seen as there is a closed caseback. The rotor is also very quiet and barely audible. The watch seems to be fairly accurate based on the brief period which I had it with me.

padi-7

SRPA21K1 has Seiko’s renowned proprietary Hardlex crystal. It gives the watch greater presence and texture, evoking a vintage feel while claiming to be harder than hesalite crystal. Although not as superior to sapphire crystal in terms of scratch resistance properties, it is durable and decent enough. The stainless steel caseback is engraved with the Air Diver logo and has a brushed finish.

Overall, I am impressed by how the watch looks. I have no issues with the weight of the watch. The Seiko Padi Turtle SRPA21K1 is a Special Edition entry level dive watch which is durable and can last for ages. It is something that is highly recommended and is much more affordable than Swiss watches. The watch is available in Singapore and retails for SGD 700+. You may consider purchasing it online via eBay or Amazon. If you are considering an entry level dive watch, this watch might just be the one for you.

padi-4

 

How to Choose a Partner by Susan Quilliam (Part 2)

For Part 1, click here

Connecting. You should aim to understand your partner. One needs to start trawling the deeper waters. We need to literally feel our partner. Face-to-face contact gives us essential knowledge in which to base judgement. The problem with online dating is that the real person might be different in real life. People tend to be more open in distance dating, which can be a good thing. You can ask serious questions on the app too. Physical contact makes everything more emotional. Proximity matters. Getting together with someone near you is very common. What is chemistry exactly? Is it over-rated? How do you form conclusions about the person? Is your decision making sound? You have to use a wider range of checks and balances. What you talk on your first date matters a lot. We need more than simply passion and opportunity. Learn to examine her values, life goals, and personality traits. Ask yourself these 3 big questions. What three values made your life most worthwhile (example: safety, happiness?). Which three goals have you achieved in your life you are most satisfied with and proud of? (career, success, adventure). What 3 personality traits do you most want other people to praise you for when you have gone? (honesty, generosity etc). Answer the 9 above and you will get a sense of what you value the most. Learn what her love languages are. They are 1) words of affirmation; 2) quality time; 3) receiving gifts; 4) acts of service; 5) physical touch. You must also know what you like so that you can explain it to your partner. Humans like sameness and the feeling is reciprocal. Many dating apps pair people based on sameness. For personality, it is possible for opposites to attract. The trick is to choose a mate with similar values and goals, but with a different personality. We shouldn’t blame women and gender difference if we break up. You need to remove the ‘veils’ during dating. You could bring up serious topics of discussion. However, do not use them too early. You have to be yourself on the date. You have to be factual and truthful. Usually, big events will reveal the other party’s personality. Emotional responsiveness is one of the most important in a relationship. This is your partner’s ability to pay loving attention to your emotional needs. Always aim to soothe and then solve. You need to be able to notice, pay attention, reflect on your partner’s emotions. Being emotionally stable is very important. Emotional responsiveness is a relationship deal-breaker. Men are not taught how to manage their emotions. Men are capable of stepping up to the relationship challenge. One’s ability for empathy is important. How you treat others is really important when you are on a date. Can I be there for you? Can you be there for me? If you are not willing to be there for her, the signs is that the relationship might be ending. You should never stop being aware of each other’s feelings, giving attention to each other’s needs and opening up to one another. We will at some point in our relationship feel insecure and unloved. How do you deal with that? People think that being secure is good all the time. But there are pros to being ‘anxious’, ‘avoidant’, ‘attacking’ too. To what extent do you want to stay calm and serene? Sex allows the relationship to be more open. It helps to secure the relationship. Synchrony sex is the best because it is a balance between physical pleasure and emotional bonding. Understand your partner’s attachment tendencies. Be wary of those off-the-scale anxious, avoidant and attacking personality. Secure is good. However, once in a while, conflicts are normal.

We may find that, after crashing the internet with reciprocally enthusiastic emails for several weeks when we finally get close to our online crush it’s loathing at first sight. – Susan Quiliam

Once there’s a basic attraction, the more time we spend close to someone, the more they will seem appealing, lovable, simply better. And the longer, more frequently, more regularly we spend time with them, the deeper the impact. – Susan Quiliam

Studies suggest that goals will become obvious first, values next, with personality revealed last of all. – Susan Quiliam

Although being authentic may feel scary, the more authentic we can be – about what we believe, what we want, who we are – the more chance we’ll have of eventually meeting a suitable prince or princess, even if that also means that en route we drive off a lot of incompatible frogs. – Susan Quiliam

Being emotionally engaged means staying rock-solid even when our partner is firing negative emotions, with us as the target – as they will do from time to time in even the most loving relationship. Easy? Not at all. – Susan Quiliam

When partners aren’t emotionally concerned about each other during courtship, then even if they decide to wed they’ll probably part in the end. – Susan Quiliam

A huge element of successful decision-making is finding out whether each partner is both able and motivated to actually learn what the other person needs and what the relationship may demand. – Susan Quiliam

Being in Love. I am a huge believer in the possibility of love. Everyone should be love-struck at least once in their life. Isn’t love just a rush of emotions? Can it be confused for lust? Love can seem like an obsessive compulsion. However, it cannot guarantee long term compatibility. There is no strong link between short-term attraction and long-term compatibility. There is a correlation between love and anxiety. When scared, our body is a nervous wreck and we tend to seek love more. Hence, anxiety leads to bonding. Love is date-stamped. We also need to know ‘what is left over’, meaning when there is no love. If you still can accept the person, most likely the relationship can last. Choose a partner which can complement you, so that you can lead a complete life. Love doesn’t make people happy all the time. When you are unhappy, you start to question whether the person is the right one. In a relationship, you have to overcome problems that our partner and partnership have. You also have to be more loving towards yourself. Even if we pick the right person, there will be challenges. Humans like those who help them to grow. If someone needs something from you and you are able to deliver, you will be drawn to that person. Accept that partner and their vulnerabilities. What would you know if you have chosen well? Be more emotionally truthful and authentic. You should be really drawn into someone at the start. You want things from your partner and they also demand things of you. Therefore, it is good to have passion and romance at the start.

Happiness will not necessarily be what marks progress; sometimes there will be pain. – Susan Quiliam

We will always be required to master the essential human balancing act of trying to answer our own needs while meeting those of our beloved, of loving ourselves while loving another, and of growing through that process. – Susan Quiliam

The lesson is that the best love is a three-art process, with the initial delights driving us on to ride out the medium-term challenges for the sake of long-term rewards. – Susan Quiliam

Knowing. The main question to ask is ‘How and when will I know enough to choose this person, or to not choose them, or to decide that the moment of choice is past?’ There are no clear answers to the above. Gut feeling is one way of telling. However, this is contrary to the elimination principle. Therefore, if the girl checks all boxes, but your gut feeling isn’t right, you can ask for another date. The problem with passion is that you are wearing rose-coloured glasses. Take your time. Sometimes, delay is good. Are you the type who goes too fast? Or do you wait too long? If you are too fast, you might make the wrong judgement. This is tricky, but it is worth altering your approach if things are not working. One approach is to be fully committed for 90 days. You shouldn’t fear rejection and other full emotional responsiveness and trust that everything will go well. If after 90 days, and you do not hesitate, that is the correct girl. If after 90 days and you hesitate, then it is a no. There are other reasons to say no, for instance, differing goals, personalities etc. Sometimes, it might not be yes or no, but change. You can tell the partner to change and if they agree, there is still chance for the relationship. Hence, if you hope that your partner will improve in time, you must have the conversation with her. If you don’t talk about such issues, the relationship is doomed. If your heart is not into someone, just leave. You are doing the person a favour by leaving. Sometimes, what if the other person doesn’t choose you? You will not get everything you want in life. You must move through the rejection and sometimes, it is not wise to try harder. Do not sacrifice everything you have for the girl. It is pointless to cling on to hope sometimes. If you are being pursued, please be aware of the danger signals. Most people will succeed in their journey to find someone. Once you know both parties are fully committed, things will work. Through the Wall of Life and tribulations, we will get through the course of our relationship. Nevertheless it is still good to specify what you want from your partner. Are you growing? Is your partner growing? Will you all continue to grow in the future?

Where possible, dig deeper, search wider, allow both logic and emotion, head and hear to synchronize. – Susan Quiliam

But it’s also best not to be too slow and too considered, for there are dangers in hesitation; we may lose not only momentum but also faith. – Susan Quiliam

As rough guidelines, 2 months of regular dating is long enough to know whether both sides want to declare themselves partners, 2 years long enough to know whether lifetime commitment is possible. – Susan Quiliam

It is fine to turn someone down. In fact, it’s actually best to turn them down if you come to the conclusion that they aren’t for you. Because by walking away you’re not just freeing yourself to find someone you can love. You are also freeing your no-longer-potential partner to find someone who can love them. Don’t feel guilty. If we know our heart is not in a relationship we do right by everyone if we leave. – Susan Quiliam

If after a while we are still not loved, then however much we mourn, it’s been a lucky escape. In the same way as it’s best to free up a partner we don’t want, it is also best to be freed from a partner who doesn’t want us. We deserve more than that. – Susan Quiliam

Every relationship suffers disequilibrium. Even for just a few moments, one person wonders while the other is certain; one person doubts while the other has faith. – Susan Quiliam

Through the Wall of Life – trials of illness, accident, job change, ageing, bereavement, and with the passing of time, we will learn more about our partner and they will learn more about us. – Susan Quiliam

That’s the hope. That if both of us keep evolving, keep learning, keep growing, then at some point in the future, we will be able to create a wonderful partnership, to relate to each other as never before, to love each other “best”. – Susan Quiliam

9781447293293how-to-choose-a-partner

Review of the Seiko Turtle SRP779

I purchased this watch in Sep 2016 from a seller on Carousell after the purchase of my G-shock GW9400 Rangeman.

The Seiko Turtle SRP779 which I purchased was a Japanese model and is part of the Seiko Prospex line of divers and has the ‘X’ on the dial. I was always looking forward to purchase a cheap Seiko which was reliable. The blue and red bezel really makes the watch pop and give it a striking appearance. The SRP779 (44.3mm case and is 14mm thick) uses the upgraded Seiko 4R36 movement, unlike some of the other lower-end Seiko 5s. It has the iconic cushion-style case which is reminiscent of the Seiko 6309s in the past. The watch is a simple time only watch with a second hand and a rotating bezel. Seiko is a renowned brand which needs no introduction whatsoever. There are other models of this modern Turtle re-make. These include the SRP773, SRP775, SRP779 and also the Seiko Padi Turtles, Green Turtles, Zimbe Turtles etc. Seiko is also releasing a Seiko Samurai Turtle in early 2017. The K series of the same watches are slightly cheaper but are supposedly of poorer built quality.

srp779v1

Seiko movements are reliable and are made in-house. The Seiko 4R36 mechanical movements (42 hour power reserve) has been around for ages and keep good time and chronometry. In addition, because they are Japanese movements, they are a lot more affordable. In fact, the 4R36s, 6R15s are comparable to Miyota movements or even Swiss ETAs. There is extensive lume on the SRP779, comparable to some of Seiko’s other divers. The watch simply glows like a torch at night! This watch is certainly an upgrade from the SKX range, which uses the 7s movement. Seiko watches are good value-for-money and aesthetically pleasing and for good reason.

abktdtj

srp779v2

The main reason why I found it so attractive was the tool-like nature of the watch. My reasons are listed below:

The SRP779 comes in a stainless steel case in a cushion style shape. (about 48mm lug-to-lug) and a silicon Z-22 rubber strap (22mm). The rubber strap is extremely durable and supple and is extremely comfortable to wear. The metal keepers on the strap are also brushed and polished, creating a splendid visual effect. I prefer wearing the watch on the rubber strap as compared to the standard Seiko metal bracelet. The cushion shaped case sits nicely on the wrist and is well-built. I have worn the Turtle for extended periods of time and have not felt any wrist fatigue.

srp779v3

The Seiko Turtle re-issue has been a great success as it closely inspired by the original Seiko 6309s. It is simply a tool watch which can be abused without the user worrying about it. The dial is largely symmetrical, other than the day-date indication at 3 o’clock. The hour markers and minute markers are shaped like broad arrows. The dial is pure black, with white fonts and markers. The Pepsi bezel is fully marked from 0 to 60. The Pepsi bezel is certainly popularized by the vintage Rolex GMT watches.

srp779v4

The SRP779 is a dive watch with 200 meters water resistance and is secured by the screw-down crown. This watch can certainly be used for sports and for daily use. It will pair well with formal attire, like a suit/blazer or even t-shirts and jeans. I have worn this piece numerous times to work and I have had no trouble with it. Being 14mm tall, it might not slide under most shirt-cuffs. I would say that the watch is quite stealthy in nature due to the dull black colour on the dial and strap. The watch does not get as much wrist time as my Ball or Tudor watches as it also costs much less. The uni-directional bezel is easy to turn and there is little play in it. The bezel also aligns perfectly to the 12 o’clock mark. However, I have read reviews that some bezels might be stiff to turn and might not align perfectly too.

srp779v6

The watch uses the Seiko 4R36 automatic movement, which is hand winding and has hacking capabilities. This a certainly a workhorse movement that is widely used in other Seikos like the famous Prospex range. The movement comes with a 42 hour power reserve when fully wound. However, I am not used to watches which can’t wind and have to be powered via wrist movements. Hence, this watch suits me more than the SKX range. The automatic movement cannot be seen as there is a closed caseback. The rotor is also very quiet and barely audible. The watch seems to be fairly accurate based on the brief period which I had it with me. Subsequently, I sold this watch and purchased the Seiko Turtle PADI (click here for the review), which is a special edition.

srp779v7

SRP779 has Seiko’s renowned proprietary Hardlex crystal. It gives the watch greater presence and texture, evoking a vintage feel while claiming to be harder than hesalite crystal. Although not as superior to sapphire crystal in terms of scratch resistance properties, it is durable and decent enough. The stainless steel caseback is engraved with the Air Diver logo and has a brushed finish.

Overall, I am impressed by how the watch looks. I have no issues with the weight of the watch. The Seiko SRP779 is a unique entry level dive watch which is durable and can last for ages. It is something that is highly recommended and is much more affordable than Swiss watches. The watch is available in Singapore and retails for SGD 603. You may consider purchasing it online via eBay or Amazon. If you are considering an entry level dive watch, this watch might just be the one for you.

srp779v5

 

How to Choose a Partner by Susan Quilliam (Part 1)

Understanding. Finding a partner can be a difficult task. It can seem like an adventure. It is also a self-development journey. Nowadays, there is a practical aspect to romance too, such as the need for financial stability etc. In the past, romance was not necessarily linked with commitment. Women are more educated, sensible and independent. Love has been a lot more emotional than ever before. Modern romance has a lot of pressures on singles. With the ability to divorce, we can choose to walk away from a relationship. We can even choose to get into another relationship with someone else if our spouse has died. Modern people have higher expectations. In addition, working hours are longer than before. Meeting a mate is indeed very challenging. We see our partner as ‘God’, someone who is perfect. The fact is that this isn’t possible and it’s implausible. In the past, due to lower expectations, there was a greater chance for couples to be happier. We have more dating windows than ever before. One can use speed dating, dating agencies and matchmakers nowadays. Technology has certainly given us more options. More couples have met via technology. The author has worked with couples via her work. The book draws on experiences to guide one in finding the right partner. You have the potential to change your future forever. Seize it.

We once sought meaning in the divine, now that we can no longer find such meaning, we seek it elsewhere. Partnership is the source which is now expected to deliver all the hope and happiness that we originally expected to get from the deity. – Susan Quiliam

Now we fear that if we choose wrong, we will end up not only alone but condemned – even damned – for our failure to make love work. – Susan Quiliam

Being Ready. It’s tempting to rush into it. Is this the right time to be looking?  There are times for being single. If you have other things to tend to, finding a partner shouldn’t be your priority. List down the things your loved ones have given you. Are all your needs met already through your current relationships? Being single allows you to pursue your real vocation. Do not simply do what ‘society’ wants or ‘everyone’ does. You can choose to marry the whole world. Do you have room to hold down a committed relationship? Map out your schedule and determine which of them have to make room for a relationship. You have to be chosen by your partner too. Often, there is a fear of rejection and of making the wrong choice. Learn to overcome the fear. Learn to be vulnerable and reveal your fear. One also needs to be emotionally available. You need to let go of emotional baggage. During post break-up is a terrible time to be a relationship. However, some people do it because of rebound effect. This is not a good idea. One needs time to heal. Are you mature enough to pick a partner in the first place? You will need to know what is worth loving, what you need and how to let go of needs when necessary. You will need to know how to love your partner. If they are not ready, give them the time and space they need.

It’s said that the best thing in life is to be happily partnered and the next best thing is to be happily single – but for some people the hierarchy’s reversed. Some of us are entirely whole without additions, flourish better without distractions, are simply happier alone. – Susan Quiliam

The ideal of singledom is highly valued in many spiritual traditions less because of puritanism than because it frees us to follow our real vocation. – Susan Quiliam

The extra sting in the tale is that the more successful we’ve been in life up to now, the more we’ve developed our career, expanded our social life and gained a rewarding lifestyle, the less room we have for partnership. – Susan Quiliam

Pearls don’t lie on the seashore. If you want one, you have to dive for it. – Chinese Proverb

Does your potential partner have time and room in their life for love? Are they over their past relationship or actually still yearning? Are they reaching out to us through genuine attraction or to fill a life gap? – Susan Quiliam

Looking Back. Look back at your past relationships and learn from them. Your decision is influenced by many factors. Are you influenced by your parents? Who has been your biggest influencer? You should know what your influences are. One develops love maps when young. You will know when a person feels right. This is known as transference. Your partner might not be able to live up to your parent’s expectations etc. You are drawn to a partner who resembles the figures you loved in the past. We know that we have to survive. Sometimes, you secretly want your partner to heal you when there is too much pain. There are many tragic events which can wound us. Similarly, your partner’s past will affect her behavior and personality now. You should just retain the useful bits of the past into your present relationship. You can cull events from your memory bank. If there are events which had you to make misguided decisions, please see a professional.

Very often, the person feels right because they remind us of someone who felt right earlier in life or because we believe that with them we can reclaim the ‘right’ life events. – Susan Quiliam

Not Choosing. There are people who believe that by not choosing, things might work out. However, this is in contrary to popular belief. Not choosing means ceding control of your life. Use a coin toss. Chance is an efficient way to decide. If you believe in fate, chances are you will not put much effort into a relationship because it was so called predetermined. Those who believe in fate are likely to react badly when things go wrong. Growth-love is more sustainable, but involves more effort. Arranged marriages and letting someone else choose for you seems like a bad idea. Matchmakers need to be competent for this arrangement to work. However, if the arranger is well informed and know the guy and girl well, things might work. Online dating seems to present a multitude of options. However, this might be an illusion because dating apps have algorithms which try to match people. They are usually superficial in nature too. Some of their apps are unproven too. Although choice is a good idea, serendipity has its joyful moments too. Enroll and ask advice from friends for guidance, consolation and celebration. Remember to take risks in the process.

It’s not just that love is one of the few areas in modern society where we may still cling to romantic notions of fate determining our future. But also, by handing over control to others, we might avoid repeating past mistakes or making new and future ones. – Susan Quiliam

Offline, be open to the occasional blind date, opportunity dinner from a colleague or fortuitous encounter at the supermarket checkout. Randomness certainly can open a different, less blinkered and therefore sometimes better door. – Susan Quiliam

If done well, “arranged marriages” can triumph, delivering the objectivity of chance, the reassurance of destiny, the pragmatism of growth. – Susan Quiliam

Focusing. More options can be good when there are a lack of alternatives. This is good if you have a small social circle. Avoid stagnant pools but learn to find slow rivers. You could take up a new hobby, dating events etc. You could sign up for a dating site too. Join a variety of sites and be open-minded. Too much choice causes people to make slow decisions. It is easy to be the victim of the shopping mentality. It might be a disaster in disguise. Hence, we need to reach a balance. Elimination is the key. Cut the field to choose only those events where you want to mingle with those in the room. Filter them to either of the categories ‘serious’, ‘fling’, ‘affair’. Use the funnel of love. Those who can’t meet our criteria will be eliminated. The problem is that we might be wary to use the funnel or reject people too quickly. If you are focusing, learn to visualize. Have the mental experience of wanting that partner, feeling entitled to want them. You need to specify your criteria. Learn to write specified lists. It will help to keep you in track. You must know what kind you want to attract. Write down all the elements of an ideal mate: gender, age, appearance, cultural background, religious belief, lifestyle, career, earnings, leisure patterns, hobbies, interests, location (also learn to identify your top 5). Write down your deal-breakers. There are 4 main ones: different sexual leanings; mismatched relationship aims; conflict in deep values; incompatibility of interests. Visualize what a ‘normal, happy day’ would seem. The person has to create the daily life that you want forever.

Don’t get trapped in a social life where you see the same people over and over again. Instead, put your energy into groups which offer a steady and regular through-flow of different individuals, in situations where there’s opportunity to mingle, meet, chat and bond. – Susan Quiliam

Quantity is less crucial than quality in partner choice, but also because the human brain treads a fine line between having a wide range of options and having too many for sanity. – Susan Quiliam

To combat the increasing confusion from emotional paralysis from having too much choice, we try to simplify. Which in turn leads to our over-considering irrelevant criteria, rejecting without real consideration, and craving the ‘next good thing’ rather than focusing on the current one. – Susan Quiliam

I’m not a believer in “The One”, but unless we start saying no to those who aren’t right for us, we won’t get anywhere near those who are. – Susan Quiliam

Partner choice is a quest, and as with all quests it’s good to have a bit of feisty courage – courage to believe in yourself, courage to believe there are partners out there you can choose, courage to believe that there are partners out there who will choose you. – Susan Quiliam

When we create a partner specification, we will often mysteriously find ourselves exploring much wider issues, not just about surface criteria but also about what we need from a partner on a deeper level, and how to instinctively recognize that when it arrives. – Susan Quiliam

9781447293293how-to-choose-a-partner