Simplicity of Life by Ivy Tan

Be an Influential Magnet For Positive Change and Abundance in Life

Introduction. Singapore is resilient and was able to navigate the Asian economic crisis in 1997 and the sub-prime crisis in 2008 successfully. Many were worried over their livelihood. Ying was mistreated as a child as her parents favored boys. Ying was not treated well by her parents. Her parents divorced but no one wanted custody of Ying. It was her grandpa that took care of her. The court ruled that the mother would have custody of Ying but later, also had difficulty in raising her. Her mum treated her harshly. This lasted for a total of 8 years as Ying completed her primary school. Grandpa was the only one who cared for her. Ying’s mother was addicted to gambling. Ying did well in Primary 8 and could go on to secondary school. However, despite this, Ying’s mother was not proud of her achievements and hit her. Ying tried to cut herself unsuccessfully and finally decided to go home. She tried to kill herself again, but was yet unsuccessful. She was warded in hospital and Grandpa visited her. Once, she witnessed a guy who swallowed many panadols to kill himself. She reached out and requested for others to help him. Due to Ying’s help, the guy managed to live. Ying was amazed that she could save someone else’s life even though she was in trouble herself. She drew strength from her own journey to help others. This was the turning point in her life. Now, she is an inspirational speaker and an international professional facilitator.

Part 1: You

Discovering life. Everyone is a gift to this world. What’s holding you back from achieving your goals and self-actualization? We all have to go through the different phases of life, including ageing. We all have to be brave and face death head on. On your death bed, looking back at your life, would you have been satisfied with your achievements? What legacy have you left behind in your life? How would you spend your time? The bulk of time would have been used for your loved ones, sleep and work. This leaves you little time for self-actualization.

Part 2: You Can. This chapter is about the 3Ps, Passion, Purpose and Potential. These are integral parts of your life that mustn’t be neglected. Having a purpose will help sustain your drive along a difficult journey. This could be like wanting to find a stable job etc. However, purpose doesn’t suddenly appear from nowhere. It usually comes from your curiosity and desire for knowledge. Working with others who are passionate will also motivate you to work harder. Remember that it is important to have a purpose as it will shut the naysayers up. Having passion can help support or nourish your Purpose. Some leaders apply operant conditioning, which is similar to the ‘carrot and stick’ model. An example of classical conditioning is when one is forced to provide frequent updates. There are 5 levels to Maslows’ Hierarchy of Needs: Physiological, Safety, Belonging, Esteem and Self-Actualization. Passionate is not in-born and has to be cultivated. With purpose and passion, can you achieve your potential? Your attitude and behavior will have a great impact over your learning and development.

Part 3: You Can Do. Everyone experiences their feelings differently. For humans, our emotions affect our attitudes and behaviors. The words of others can trigger an emotion in you, leading you to take a course of action. One should not aim to change your emotions, because that wouldn’t be your authentic self. It is much easier to control your choices as compared to your thoughts/ emotions. Do not enter self-denial and let your choices affect the subsequent tone of voice/ choice of words. One should take a breather and think about their choices logically. We tend to only tell the truth towards those whom we can trust. It is hence important to stay logical and tell the truth. Always remember that you have the power to choose. The first C in Choice is Consider. Resist jumping into conclusions. Try to approach life with less expectations as that would lead to less disappointments. One event in a day is completely unrelated to another in a day and you should not link the two. The second letter is H, which is for Hold. This refers to choosing a proactive attitude instead of a reactive one. This also means exploring options and choices. The third letter is O, which is for Observe. Make Sense with SENSES (Seek, Examine, Note, Study, Evaluate, Steer). Learn to observe the pattern and practice a logical questioning technique to get to the root of the issue.

How to Think Like an Entrepreneur by Philip Delves Broughton

Introduction. Most entrepreneurs fail. However, it is a good learning experience nonetheless. The main reason why people fail is that they become demoralized. Yet, the start-up scene is thriving and buzzing. However, one tends to only hear of the successful stories. This is a case of WYSIATI – What You See is All There Is. Optimism can be costly indeed. To succeed is a great achievement in itself. It is a way out of the corporate life. You are doing it for yourself. It allows you to innovate and to challenge what is already out there in the market. It gives emotion its proper place. Before starting, optimism might not be as useful as compared to when the business has been established. There will be ups and downs, successes and despairs. This book is a guide for those who want to take this path. You can also be entrepreneurial as an employee. Learn to pursuit a path of your own. Obama had his doubts before running for President. This book will describe the ways you need to think as you first decide whether to be one. There is a link between economies which thrive and the freedom of individuals to flourish. People must be free to use their knowledge and talents in order for society to grow. A modern economy can produce dreams into reality. There needs to be a balance between satisfying the corporatists and the individualists. We need to think about what is means to be an entrepreneur.

Entrepreneurship offers a way out of corporate life, out of a system of task-and-reward allocation run by others, to one run by you. You get to decide how to work, what to work on, and how to divide the rewards. – Philip Delves Broughton

If you are a chef chafing on the line, yearning to create dishes which exist only in your imagination, finding investors and opening your own restaurant is a way to turn that yearning into action. – Philip Delves Broughton

People with so much to protect are not always inclined to support those agitating for change. Yet to think like an entrepreneur is to be modern. To want change, to search for opportunity and then be willing to pursue it. – Philip Delves Broughton

The Entrepreneurial Mind. The Material Question. George Gurdjieff was the founder of Institute for the Harmonious Development of Man. He was taught to create new stuff since young. Through this, he was able to surmount many difficulties. He was tricky and pretended to repair other people’s goods for a fee. As a result, he became rich. This experience fortified him.

If you can find your customers’ pain and heal it, how you do it and how much you charge will scarcely matter. – Philip Delves Broughton

Cognitive Complexity. Some people say entrepreneurs are control freaks, risk addicts etc. The only common trait they all share is that they choose to be entrepreneurs. The two habits of mind is cognitive complexity and greed. You must be tolerant of new ideas and curious about the experiences which challenge you. You must trust that the world will take care of you. There is also a need to internalize different cultures. Your upbringing also plays a part. One way to learn is to be marginalized and to be forced into awkward social positions. Usually, difficult times will toughen you up for the subsequent challenges in life. Sometimes, over-specialization can cause you to lose sight of how to make connections between diverse fields. It would be good to have a mentally intensive hobby like music, painters, writers etc.

Wanting It. Entrepreneurs can have different attitudes to money. Some show them off and flaunt their wealth. Mark Zuckerberg wears the same T-shirt all the time. Bill Gates and Mark Zuckerberg all do something they are nuts about. Would you want to be ‘rich or king’? Would you want to be rich and cash out? Or retain control and manage a growing enterprise? Do you want to be a king over a smaller domain? There are 4 types of people: 1) Work for themselves and for no one else; 2) Join businesses and reach senior positions; 3) Work for others but unspectacularly; 4) Work for others but are not motivated to work hard or improve the organization. The first 2 possess the Millionaire Mentality. They know the value of a dollar and the importance of not to squander it. Some people only think of excess profits earned should be reinvested in the business. A greed for improvement and for success is nothing to be ashamed about.

An independent spirit and an appetite for success, of which money can be a significant market, is what sets the flywheel of entrepreneurial achievement in motion. – Philip Delves Broughton

Age vs Experience. Some of the tech geniuses are still in their 20s. Younger people have more resilience. They invest in the young. The average age of American entrepreneurs which started their first company is 40. VCs love younger people. The best time to start when you the right energy and competence. As you age, your energy level drops. Good businesses require credibility to attract investors and employees and managerial experience.

The Old Man and the Fish. One can get inspiration from old objects, like the oldest life forms. For instance, a designer got inspiration from the body of a fish to create a fish-inspired design. It was a unique architectural vision. Gehry was 69.

Closing the Experience Gap. You have to think of the inverted U of productivity and where you currently fall along the curve. Larry Page and Sergey Brin were young when they started their first search engine. Being ambitious is important. Eric Schmidt was hired as the Google CEO. In 2011, he stepped aside to let Page be CEO. Sheryl Sandberg agreed to be Facebook CEO. In 2012, it went IPO. Both these companies realized that they needed to move up the inverted U curve of productivity and age by hiring. Sometimes, you can’t do it alone.

A Brief History of an Idea. What does entrepreneurship mean? It was associated with being a merchant. They were also innovators who struck out on their own. Ralph Waldo Emerson encouraged people to look inwards for inspiration. One has to be comfortable with solitude. The entrepreneur was more than just a manager of risk. John Rockefeller was the first billionaire. Business was about ‘survival of the fittest’. Schumpeter was an economist. He understood the importance of economics. Later, he lectured in Harvard. He was a very ambitious man indeed. He knew that growth in an economy was dependent on entrepreneurs. Because of them, entrepreneurship would be revolutionized. Change was the only constant. Peter Drucker had a similar career path to Schumpeter. To him, it was possible to learn entrepreneurship. He also identified entrepreneurship in other fields.

The entrepreneur always searches for change, responds to it, and exploits it as an opportunity. – Peter Drucker

Searching for Opportunity. The Adjacent Possible. Chris Blackwell was fascinated by Jamaicans after they took care of him. Later, he got inspired to write music. The Jamaica’s Rastafarians music became popular throughout the world. Sometimes, you might find ideas in areas which you might least expect. This is known as the ‘adjacent possible’, which is discovering opportunities in the work that surrounds them. Gillette the shaver was a great idea and created a near monopoly effect for years.

Nearly 75% of entrepreneurs find their ideas while in their current job. A fifth find them by chance and fewer than 5% by systematically searching for new opportunities. – Philip Delves Broughton

The Gossip Test. Francis Crick wondered what he should do after WWII. He didn’t know what to do with life. However, he realized the lack of qualifications could be an advantage. He knew a bit about physics and mathematics. Later he saw Kreisel. Later, he discovered his love for antibiotics. Later, he chose molecular biology. Later, he went on to win the Nobel Prize, for the discovery of the double-helical structure of DNA.

I had discovered the gossip test – what you are really interested in is what you gossip about. – Philip Delves Broughton

A bug Named Jim. Jim Collins often filled his notebook with observations of the world. He felt dissatisfied at HP. He observed bugs in a jar. Through time, he realized that he preferred academia and he eventually work many books on management and business success. Self-observation and self-awareness are very important indeed.

Shifts and Disruptions. Thomas Kuhn was a professor and a historian. To him, both Aristotle and Newton were right, just that they were in different paradigms. How do you figure out which paradigm is good for you. For instance, in sports, the paradigm might be discipline, strength and hard work. If you are not that fit, you could use another paradigm, this could be strategizing more on the field. This tactic might work over time as well. Disruption is a term which often means paradigm shift too. Not every star-ups need to disrupt in order to success. However, the start-up should understand the theory before you launch in practice. Too many layers in a company became self-reinforcing. This is why big companies are less creative and less nimble. IBM dominated in the 1965s but the mainframes were gradually less popular. The mainframe companies failed. Most companies who get disrupted could see it coming but didn’t do anything about it. Kodak was a failure who went bankrupt. Newspaper businesses suffered the similar fate. One needs to try to attack the prevailing mode of doing business. Even in surgery, balloon angioplasty revolutionized heart surgery. Now, the costs are lower as well. Disruption can occur in any field and we must be prepared for it.

The Slow Hunch. Inventions emerge from the mass of human experience. Every generation after should be better than the previous one. Someone figured out that freezing food fast could preserve the condition and taste of food. One’s curiosity of nature is important. Ideas packaged together in a new configuration is crucial.

Responding to Opportunity. Assembling Complementary Assets. You must consider which assets to keep in-house and which to outsource. You can self-publish or go via a publisher. In entrepreneurship, you will be involved in a lot of decision making.

People. Corporate executives spend days trying to manage volume. As entrepreneurs, you have to come up with your own options. Decision making is crucial as you must make decisions that also are in-line with the long term goal of the company. People are a huge factor. They may be difficult to fire if they turn out poor. Agents are employees but whose loyalty might be limited and be non-committed. You might issue some equity to employees so that they can work harder. You must also be able to be brutally honest to people. You cannot put off decision making as it is painful. Some things have to be done no matter what.

Loneliness can kill a start-up and the enthusiasm and presence of friends is reassuring in those early, uncertain days. But unless there is a sound business logic for their presence, you could be in for trouble. – Philip Delves Broughton

Entrepreneurs get to see their decision bear fruit. What they say goes, and that freedom, that actualization through action, is the thrill of what they do. – Philip Delves Broughton

Context. You must have a relationship with your landscape. Your success might not be easily measured.

It’s not about going where everyone else is going, where the contest will be fiercest and the rivalries intense. It is about going to the place where you will have a natural edge over every other sucker who rolls into town, where you can take the risk that others never could. – Philip Delves Broughton

Planning. You will constantly grapple between the questions of ‘how’ and ‘what’. It is like building the plane at the same time as your hurtle towards take-off. Your business plan that you created is unlikely to suit the market. Plans need to be adapted to suit circumstance. The aim of the business plan is to get the entrepreneur to think. You must think both short and long-term for your business.

The business plan can be an invaluable checkpoint for the rational entrepreneur. It allows you to think about what you might need before you actually need it. – Philip Delves Broughton

Exploiting Opportunity. The Struggle. Elon Musk was in bad financial shape in the end of 2008. He had ventured into SpaceX and Tesla. At that time, he thought he was doomed. Thankfully, his investors bailed him out at the last minute. Then SpaceX won a billion dollar contract with NASA. He managed to pull it off. Musk has a tremendous ability to take pain and be hyper-rational about decision making. Failure might inevitably set it for an entrepreneur. Most people are not strong enough to overcome their struggle.

Being and Becoming. Those who have followed Elon would have earned rewards. His engineers would work all day and night. The work culture was addictive. They also were ingenious and could improvise at rates inconceivable at larger companies. They managed to build engine within 3 days. They built rockets from scratch. Falcon 1 failed in 2006. Musk painted them an image that their work was worthwhile.

SpaceX is in this for the long haul and, come hell or high water, we are going to make this work. – Elon Musk

It is the difficulty of entrepreneurship that leads to the fullest imaginable life. Work provides the framework for self-discovery, for finding out who we can be when we meet great challenges. – Philip Delves Broughton

Failure 1 and Failure 2. There are two types of failures, there are trivial failures and soul-shaking ones. Failure 1 are failures intrinsic to the scientific method. However, this eliminates one possibility. This is like one of the materials that won’t cause the lightbulb to light. Nowadays, you can start something off as a prototype and gain traction. However, iteration is important and iteration is a form of beauty in itself. Failure 2 are those that tests you as a person. An example of this is being on the verge of bankruptcy and emerging from the abyss. You don’t want to mess around with Failure 2s.

Most attempts fail not because of lack of brains but because the investigator gets stuck in a cul-de-sac or gives up too soon – Francis Crick

Indifference and Lightness. Stoics recommend we contemplate the worst possible experiences in life. Always anticipate the worst. Seneca was a famous stoic. Zen is a form of emotional therapy which is useful too. Steve Jobs established Apple University. It was a leadership programme. Steve Jobs’ character defined Apple. They were focused on good design. Jobs was fascinated with Zen Buddhism. For people to practice this, the past does not matter. Building a business was for the passionate and persistent. Learn to trust your gut. Value your loss as it gives you time to work on your work and family. Sometimes, you will meet success along unconventional paths. The rewards of the work matter little to the work itself.

To think like an entrepreneur is to think in terms of change, often dramatic change. And to change anything, one must move lightly, unburdened by the drab expectations of others. – Philip Delves Broughton

Quitter by Jon Acuff (Part 2)

Falling in Like With a Job You Don’t Love. In the past, I was obsessed over quitting my job. Later on, people encouraged me to quit because of my dreams. Quitting your day job is not fulfilling the American dream. People assume your dream is more lucrative. However, writing doesn’t pay well. Dreams rarely pay well at the start. Your dream needs time to incubate. It takes very long indeed. Without incubation time, it will die. Keeping at a day job allowed my dream to have incubation time. What you do in one area of your life will affect the other areas too. Your work attitude tends to follow you home too. Remember why you work. I work to support my family. When you chase your dreams, sometimes you become selfish in your ways. Look for parallels. Starbucks is going to teach you accounting, marketing etc. You can learn from any job you have. Learn to start small and work from there. Look for purpose. Ask how can your day job benefit your dream job and vice versa. How can your chase for your dream job positively affect your day job? People was my purpose. Every dream involves people. You can definitely find purpose in your day job. Do not ever steal from work. This means working on your personal goals while at work. You are supposed to do work in your job description. One way to overcome this is to work very hard in your weekday evenings on your dream so you won’t feel pressed for time. Another way is to take on more assignments at work. Your employers didn’t pay you to work on your dream during working hours. Be honest and diligent with your day job hours. Think of your job as your adversary, not your advocate is a screwed up way of thinking. Protect the way you look at your boss and your company. The next wrong way is to demand that your job meet the needs of your dream. You are not entitled to anything.

The truth is, we need to learn to fall in like with a job we don’t live because it’s actually the best way to set up your dream for success. – Jon Acuff

Bad employees make horrible dreamers. You can’t loaf on your day job all week and then expect to magically throw the switch on the weekend and hustle on your dream. The things you do on your day job tend to follow you home. – Jon Acuff

We get really focused on our own stuff and our own dreams and we lose sight of the many, many reasons it is critical that you do great work at your day job. – Jon Acuff

The romantic way too look at it is that my dream job bled over into my day job. The candid way to look at it is that I was stealing from work. When you do your dream on work time, that’s stealing from your employer. – Jon Acuff

Wait on the Main Stage. We have to get on the main stage. It can be very nervous to speak on the main stage. To many, speaking at a lab is a failure. However, we all need to speak on the side before moving to the main stage. Plans are important, however, do not plan too much. Plans always change and they are fluid. The problem are that plans are too vague and no detailed steps are necessary. It’s like soccer, you can’t plan for everything as every moment is different. There are too many variables in life. You will not be able to script every detail. You do not need a plan. You need passion to drive you forward. The second thing you need is practice. You must show up every day and make it a habit. Just keep practising and practising. The conditions of your dream will change all the time. We like to see the underdog defeat the best. It is like David and Goliath. When you are small, nobody likes and respects you. Developing our dream job is more about hard work rather than grand moments in life. Start small and go along the way. We all need the gift of invisibility at the start. It’s harder to take risks when many people are watching you. Anonymity is the best because you have nothing to lose. You are a free man. Cherish it while it is still around.

Focus on your passion first. Your passion will always fuel your plan. Rarely will a plan fuel a passion. It will contribute. It will shape it. It will most certainly help it. – Jon Acuff

There Will Be Hustle. I have never taken blogging seriously. Things worked out because I hustled. Our desire to complicate matters is because we are lazy and fearful. Hustle is not hard. Sometimes, you will have to do the things you don’t enjoy. Dreams start in the morning. When you wake up, this is the best time to hustle. You don’t have excuses in the morning. One tends to have less excuses in the morning. When you start on your dreams in the morning, it will leave you happier throughout the day. As you grow older, you waste less time. It will force you to prioritize. The clue is to do more of the things you love and less of the things you like. Chasing your dreams isn’t all rosy and shit. The more you practice, the better you become. There is a lot of practice involved. Put quantity before quality. You have to learn 3 things about people. They won’t pay for what they can get for free. You will have to differentiate the product before they will pay. You have to weigh the long-term benefits of doing something for free. If there is a bigger gain from you not charging at speaking events, then don’t charge. Free pays dividends towards expertise. Doing stuff for free improves your exposure. Competition can be a big motivator but it is not a good measurement tool. If you feel you are better than your competitor, then you will get complacent. If you realize how much your opponent is better than you, you will get discouraged. Try not to measure your dream against someone else’s dream. Blog stats could be one potential measure. Your message must stay true to yourself. The best measure is the amount of work you have put in. This is the factor which you can control. Measure the number of days which you woke up early.

I love the title Quitter but still think that a core element holding this entire book together is a need to hustle. To push harder than the other person. To dream further. To work longer and faster. – Jon Acuff

Hustle is not hard. If you write your blog every day, at the end of the year you will have more readers than when you started. If you get up early and work on your dream two hours more than somebody else, your dream will progress faster. – Jon Acuff

The reality is that when you get busy doing the things that matter to you, you actually have more time to do the things you love and less time to do the things you like. – Jon Acuff

Learn to Be Successful at Success. You do not become an overnight celebrity. Do not misinterpret what success looked like for a dream. Success is the Bermuda Triangle of dreams. There are challenges associated with success too. Another problem is that we get arrogant. Overconfidence is scary. Do not let success kill your dream. Learn to define what is ‘enough’. You can send future emails to yourself. Write yourself a letter in the future. Success will often tell you that it is never enough and that you should strive even more. Define your enough. It is important not to burn out. You must always invest in relationships or they will die. Burn your dream bright but do not burnout. Please understand that the land of later is a myth. Kids do not believe in later. There will always be trade-offs. It is important to spend time with your family and kids too. Don’t turn your platform into a prison. Learn to have multi-generation dreams. Build a legacy that is bigger than individuals’ lives and actions. If you have a dream, share it with others. Do not take on opportunities which are not linked to your dream. Avoid saying yes to the wrong things.

Quit Your Day Job. I left my day job. My boss expected it. How do you know you’re really ready to leave? Learn to fill up this scorecard. 1) You have worked hard on your dream for more than a month/ a few months. Please understand that not everyone needs to quit their day job. The author had 6 reasons for quitting his day job. They are 1) He had somewhere to land. Next, the opportunity fit our opportunity filter. The author tested the dream before he quit. It is important to practice what you want to do with your life. I had a support network. We could afford to move. God seemed cool with our dream. It is important to establish some important ground rules. Share the rules and others hold you accountable. Make a list of risks that might appear after you leave your day job. Friendships might take long to form. In addition, you might be required to travel more. Money could be an issue too. You might need to pay rent for a home. We really can’t have two different versions of ourselves ‘work me’ and ‘life me’. To some extent, your work defines you. You think your job just funds the rest of your life. This cheapens the value of work. Some people think work is never meant to be fulfilling. There will always be hard and difficult moments at work. However, you have to do things you don’t necessarily enjoy at times. However, work can be fun sometimes. A menial task has meaning too.

You can’t spend 40 hours a week doing something and think it won’t impact you. You can’t spend half of your waking hours somewhere and think it doesn’t affect you. You can’t make a perfectly clean break between your life inside and outside work. – Jon Acuff

You can fake that you love your job for months, maybe even years, convincing everyone you work with that you care about the company, the business or the job. But your apathy for a job always comes out eventually. – Jon Acuff

If you quit your job without understanding why you’re quitting, you’ll just jump from job to job to job. You’ll become a serial quitter like I was. The things you didn’t like at the job before will show up in your next job. And the next. The common denominator in every bad job you’ve quit is you. – Jon Acuff

As a Man Thinketh by James Allen

A Practical Guide to Living the Purpose Driven Life.

Thought and Character. People are makers of themselves. A man is literally what he thinks. His character is all his thoughts summed up. Man can derive either joy or suffering from such thoughts. In order to achieve a noble character, Man must think in the right way. He is the master of his destiny and the master of thought. As such, he holds the key to every situation. When things aren’t working out well, Man is conscious and can correct his thought. If he digs down further, he will examine cause and effect and the effect of thought. All this is the means to attain Wisdom, Understanding and Power.

As a man thinketh in his heart so is he – James Allen

Effect of Thought on Circumstances. Man’s mind can be cultivated or neglected. Just like tending to a garden, Man can rid the garden of weeds (of impure thoughts).  Man’s character will be shaped by his outer environment as well. However, it is linked to thought-element within himself too. Thought will lead to action and action will lead to opportunity/circumstance. Nothing can influence Man’s thoughts. A man who wants to acquire wealth must be willing to make great sacrifices. If a man who wants to get rich starts to shirk his work, or complains that his wages are too low, deserves to stay poor. It is very important for your thoughts to harmonize with your goal. However, at times, good thoughts might not lead to better circumstances immediately. If a poor man thinks life is unfair, then something is wrong. A man can be rich and cursed or be blessed and poor. Indigence and indulgence are examples of wretchedness. Look for the hidden justice in your life. Use your circumstances in order to discover your powers and possibilities within himself. You cannot choose your circumstances, but you can choose your thoughts. The world is your kaleidoscope.

Man, therefore, as the lord and master of thought, is the maker of himself the shaper and author of environment. – James Allen

Man is buffeted by circumstances so long as he believes himself to be the creature of outside conditions, but when he realizes that he is a creative power, and that he may command the hidden soil and seeds of his being out of which circumstances grow, he then becomes the rightful master of himself. – James Allen

Men are anxious to improve their circumstances, but are unwilling to improve themselves; they therefore remain bound. The man who does not shrink from self-crucifixion can never fail to accomplish the object upon which his heart is set. – James Allen

Suffering is always the effect of wrong thought in some direction. It is an indication that the individual is out of harmony with himself. – James Allen

Let a man radically alter his thoughts, and he will be astonished at the rapid transformation it will effect in the material conditions of his life. Men imagine that thought can be kept secret, but it cannot; it rapidly crystallizes into habit, and habit solidifies into circumstance. – James Allen

Effect of Thought on Health and the Body. The body is the servant of the mind. With good thoughts, the body will seem radiant and energetic. Anxiety and fear opens the body to decay. You must have clean thoughts. Learn to beautify your mind whenever possible. For those that have lived righteously, aging is a calm and peaceful process.

Strong, pure, and happy thoughts build up the body in vigor and grace. The body is a delicate and plastic instrument, which responds readily to the thoughts by which it is impressed, and habits of thought will produce their own effects, good or bad, upon it. – James Allen

Thought and Purpose. Thought and purpose/goals must be linked. If you are aimless, you will achieve nothing. Everyone needs a central purpose in their lives. One should find an object and steady and focus one’s thoughts on it. Even if he fails to achieve his purpose, he would have gained a deep strength of character. If you don’t have a purpose, fix your thoughts on a faultless performance of their duty. Try to avoid thoughts of doubt and fear as much as possible. Your every thought should be imbued with power. You must be conscious of your mental powers.

The Thought-Factor in Achievement. Your weaknesses and strengths are brought about by your own doing. The weak man must be willing to help himself. A man must learn to overcome weakness and selfish thoughts. He can rise by lifting up his thoughts. There can be no achievement without sacrifice. Achievement comes from effort. Do not allow arrogance, selfish and corrupt thoughts to enter.

He who would accomplish little must sacrifice little; he who would achieve much must sacrifice much; he who would attain highly must sacrifice greatly. – James Allen

Vision and Ideals. Humans need to dream. Most people have no goals/dreams in their life. One must have a vision in his heart, in order to realize it. As you dream, you shall become. Dreams are the seedlings of reality. You will gravitate towards the thing that you secretly love. You will become the master of your dream. Some men think that others have become successful just via luck and become jealous. They do not understand the hard work and sacrifice that others have undergone.

Cherish your visions; cherish your ideals; cherish the music that stirs in your heart, the beauty that forms in your mind, the loveliness that drapes your purest thoughts. – James Allen

The Vision that you glorify in your mind, the Ideal that you enthrone in your heart – that you will build your life by, this you will become. – James Allen

Serenity. Calmness of mind is really important. He knows how to adapt himself to others. The more peaceful you are, the greater your chance of success. The strong man is revered. They are never temperamental.

Dating Tips 107

The Secret to Having Confidence, Being a Man, and Getting Women

Medium Size Dicks Get Chicks by Patrick Withrow

You will learn the blueprint to have success in your life and relationships. Relationships are important as they will help us drive our lives and give it direction. . We want to be more attractive to others. Develop successful habits which are allow you to land girls. Learn to feel confident etc. Dive in the book and change your outlook on life forever. Learn to kick ass.

Find Your Purpose. What do you want to be remembered for? Live your life like a movie. There is no need to aim for an end goal. However, it is important to keep working towards a goal and challenge yourself. This will make you appear attractive to the ladies. You must communicate your journey that you are embarking on. Try to make it seem that you have noble goals and are making the world a better place. It will show that you don’t need a woman to find happiness. The trick is not to seem needy. ‘Are you showing girls that you need their attention or are you on a purpose when you are around the females that you aren’t attracted to?’ The trick is to work hard on your purpose. Even if you are fat, but if you show that you go to the gym, people will start to respect you. If you love life, you will be able to attract the right people in your life. Write down your goals and push all the way. The difficult games and challenges are the ones you should strive for. Your purpose should be specific in nature and it should be documented. It must be measurable. It is okay to listen to others. These people must be congruent to your purpose.

The easiest things you can do are being nice to people, being confident in yourself, staying motivated and disciplined towards your goals, smiling, and being so happy and grateful that you are even fucking alive! – Patrick Withrow

Find Your Environment. Jot down the names of the people you surround yourself with. Learn to defeat your fears. The author loves stand-up comedy and it is something that he feels everyone should try. I realized that I wasn’t spending enough time with others and building on relationships. There needs to be a balance. Be completely present and listen to the girl. Girls want a warrior in their lives. Eventually, I realized creating online businesses saved the most time. I took a degree and wanted to pursue my dream. There is always a sense of ‘incompletion’ in your life. Give 5 things to work on this year. Only focus on 5 aspects of your life. Write your goals and dreams down. Money is always not enough. Learn to think about your mortality. Think about the dreams you had when you were young. Life is short and you need to be present every day and pay attention to every details.

The Hero in You. This chapter is about conquering your fears. It is okay to have fears. Facing your fears is one way to allow us to grow. The more you experience, the better you will be. How many hours are you dedicating to your dream? Exercising early in the morning (5am) will set off your day on the right footing. Tackle difficult tasks from 6 to 8am every day. Accomplishing a difficult task early in the day gives you a boost of confidence. You definitely do not want to be trapped in a cycle of tiredness and lethargy. Many people fail to appreciate how short like is and how precious life can be. You can be anything you want. If you start believing in yourself, you will realize that things are different.

Get Your Sensei’s. Surround yourself with people like coaches and mentors. They will be able to help you. The stronger your identity will be if you are able to get help from others. Always read more and have the thirst for more information. Enjoy the process so that you can be a better person. Never be afraid of rejection. Sometimes, the girl could be going through an emotional phase. You need to be consistent in what you are good at. Learn to create the right mindset. Look deep down to learn about yourself. Make your personality so appealing that others will like you instantly. Be positive in every aspect of your life. There will always be haters, but you should not bother about them. You should not bother trying to control and change people. The only one you can change is yourself. Go to the places where you can maximize the chance of meeting girls you like. If you are drunk, girls will avoid you. Therefore, it is smarter to go sober. Do what your heart wants you to do. Make strong habits and enjoy life. Focus and be great now. Wake up early and be focused and do the difficult things. Exercising in the morning increases serotonin, dopamine and endorphins. Just wake up early. It takes a full 66 days to make it a habit.

Do the opposite of what everyone else is doing. Pave your own path and rule your life because when you do that chicks will want to know more about you. They will want to be by your side because they will feel secure in your presence. – Patrick Withrow

Quit the Bad Habits. Do not be rude when eating. Do not pick up smoking, drinking and all that. The 7 habits to avoid are 1) cigarettes; 2) chewing tobacco; 3) poor hygiene; 4) poor listening skills; 5) biting your nails; 6) eating sugary, unhealthy and fatty foods; 7) unmotivated.

Online dating and the art of body language. If you want to play the online game, spend some money as it guarantees that the girl will be more serious. However, the author feels that there are many girls on it who have just undergone break-ups. The best way is to present and understand life as it is now. Stop being addicted to your phone. It helps to detach yourself from technology and be more involved in the environment instead. Read more books which can help you to grow. Females love intellectual guys. Take note of the following bad body languages: 1) arms crossed; 2) feet pointed away from you; 3) rubbing her arm; 4) pinching the bottom of her ear; 5) poor eye contact. Some great cues to look out for are: 1) bambi eyes; 2) playing with hair; 3) they touch you; 4) if she smiles. Mirror her body language to have a better chance of connecting with her. Even if you are not confident, act that you are. You need to be cautious of online dating as there might be weird people on the site. Please be wary.

There are billions of females in the world, you are going to get rejected, but it’s a numbers game. The more opportunities a person gives himself the more potential success a man will have. – Patrick Withrow

Fear is a Portal into Your Best Life. Practise meeting women on a daily basis. Never rush into a relationship or you will regret it. Try to go after the good looking girls first. Continue to progress and meet new girls. Remember your purpose in life. If you do not feel sufficiently attracted to her, then you need to move on.

If you are confident in every aspect of your life, you are going to win so much. If you are confident in your career path, your health, using your time effectively, living your life to the fullest, she will be so attracted to you. – Patrick Withrow

Are you Fully Charged? by Tom Rath

The 3 keys to energizing your work and life. They are ‘Meaning’; ‘Interactions’ and ‘Energy’.

When you are fully charged, you can perform at your optimum. You will also be able to do more for others. It is difficult to integrate knowledge from books into your daily routine. Learn to create daily well-being. It is important to measure life on a daily basis. Technology can allow you to measure a lot more than is necessary. Having a higher salary does not change your daily happiness once you have hit the income threshold. Once you have met your basic needs, income is unlikely to increase your happiness. Daily experience is important and should not be underestimated. Focus on improving your own happiness. Take small and meaningful steps today. Energy refers to both mental and physical health. Most people struggle on a daily basis. You do not need to do anything drastic to change yourself.

Meaning

Creating Meaning with Small Wins. If you know your time is limited, you will want to make a difference every single day. I ended up feeling more energized. I can continue to invest in my future. Little and value-adding moments create substance and meaning. People who search for happiness are unlikely to find it. Pursue happiness for your loved ones and community. However, seeking your own happiness is unlikely to work. Meaning is centred more around others. Humans love to pursue meaning. Create meaning for yourself and for those around you.

The essential thing people want in a job today is work that will allow them to create meaning for others. My research suggests that the odds of being completely engaged in your job increase by more than 250% if you spend a lot of time doing meaningful work throughout the day. – Tom Rath

Pursue Life, Liberty and Meaningfulness. Since young, people always have the need for meaningful work. The book cites Viktor Frankl’s “Man Search for Meaning”. Intrinsic motivation is richer than extrinsic motivation. Those who exhibit intrinsic motivation are more likely to persist and not give up. It is easy to fall in the money trap and forget about meaning. Carrot and stick methods are not very effective anymore. Find activities outside work that can appeal to your intrinsic motivation. Create your own meaning. Look at the big picture. Focus small first. Attach the dots and start by having small and meaningful interactions.

Creating meaning can be practical – and relevant – to the people you care about most. Start by asking why your current job or role even exists. In most cases, jobs are created because they help another person, make a process more efficient, or produce something people need. – Tom Rath

Make Work a Purpose, not just a place. Some people see their work as a calling. Identify your work with a larger purpose. Find bigger meaning in what you do. Have meaningful interactions with your co-workers. Work should not be just about a pay-check. Work in the modern context should be a lot more and be packed with meaning. People work in teams now. In the past, people worked like machines due to industrialization. Job satisfaction levels are at an all-time low. People need to change their relationships with employers. Derive meaning from your work. Meaningful work is highly associated with job satisfaction levels.

Find a Higher Calling than Cash. Money is not main concern now. Non-financial incentives can work as well, or even better. Do not get caught on the hedonic treadmill. Money should not be the primary determinant. Rather, ask yourself whether you have made a difference? Doubling your income will not make you twice as happy. However, do note that financial security is important for your well-being. Avoid upward comparison. Wealth can cause you to embark on more stressful tasks. Money tends to make one behave more selfishly. Incentives on a group basis is better than at the individual level.

A fortune will always be relative to the person who has more, and fame is fleeting. While you may be rewarded with a large bonus or major recognition at certain times, most days consist of making a little forward progress without external reward. – Tom Rath

Ask what the world needs. Apply your creativity whenever you can. It is important to know your talents and passions. Find a way to make a difference. Start with what the customers want. Instead of following your passion, ask what you can give. Look at everyday problems that need addressing. Find the intersection between ‘Interest – you want to do’; ‘Needs of others and the world’ & ‘Strengths – What you are good at’. Find your unique purpose in this world. Find where you are naturally at or in. Start building knowledge and skills. When you use your strengths, it tends to bring better job satisfaction. Spend a lot of time at something to be very proficient at it. Double your energies on something. Act now before today is over. Try to find tasks that can match your interests. Most people do not spend their time on meaningful pursuits. Do not let time fly by without you realizing and then it might be too late.

Don’t Fall in the Default. Most of the time, you are following the dreams of someone else. Most people want to follow in the footsteps of a mentor or a sibling. Some people act because of peer pressure. There is a high chance towards gravitating towards something which your parents chose. It is not wrong to follow their dream. However, sometimes you must follow your own too. As humans, we need to forge our own path. Identify certain traits in children when they are young. Ask ‘why’. Everyone grows up with different expectations. Find your area of passion by exploring. Do not live in the shadow of others. Craft your dream into your job. Find activities that recharge you. Seek small things that you can see progress in. It could be something like boosting your spirits of those at work. One good way could be volunteering with the community. People forge good jobs, rather than finding them through job postings. ‘Effective “job crafting” starts by looking at how much time you dedicate to specific tasks which give you energy every day.’ Spend more time in your element, if possible. Spend less time around those people who will not energize you.

Initiate to Shape the Future. It is easy to spend your whole day responding and reacting. It is what you initiate now that matters. Most people spend more time reacting than initiating. Try to initiate something new every day. Are modern people too busy nowadays? Activity may not mean real progress. A lot of people multi-task too much and that doesn’t lead to much productivity. Chances are that if you are too busy, you might be missing out the important things in life. Work smarter, not harder. Information is coming fast and people are always connected. Due your mind wandering, it is difficult to concentrate on any task at hand. Sometimes, disconnecting from distractions can be very useful. Write down tasks which waste time and try to avoid doing so much of that. Dogs can be conditioned to salivate. Do not treat information as a form of reward. Most people spend too much time checking their emails. Modern people check their mobile phones way too often. Learn to shut off your notifications. Most phones have a switch off notifications function. Set aside time to focus on one particular task alone.

Focus for 45, Break for 15. In schools in Finland, kids are given a 15 minute break for every 45 minutes of work. This method was good and allowed the kids to feel energized. People are more attentive when they receive timely breaks. During the break, learn to take a stroll. Intense bursts, followed by short breaks, is the way to go. This is a purposeful way of work. Finding a purpose in life helps to combat ageing and improves cognitive health. Let employees try to see the results of their work. Infuse each day with a reminder of your mission. Always recite the mission to keep you motivated.

Interactions

Make Every Interaction Count. Widowhood effect affects the ones around you as well. We are influenced by those around us, and they might not just be our friends. Your actions affect those around you. Those with higher positive interactions have a higher chance of having a better well-being. Negativity can affect positive exchanges. Do not assume bad intent in others. Be peace loving. Constantly try to build good relationships with others. Physical proximity matters. Close relationships can have a profound effect over time.

Be 80% positive. If you are constantly positive, you tend to feel frustrated. The ratio of positive to negative interactions matter a lot. When stressed, your body produces more cortisol. Positive emotions result in a release of oxytocin. In general, people need 3 to 5 positive interactions for every negative interaction. Managers should spend more time focusing on what works as compared to what doesn’t. Positive words help to bind relationships. Try to use positive words as much as possible in daily conversations. Do not ignore people and always pay attention to others. Negative feedback is better than nothing at all.

Start Small and Be Clear. Do not get caught up in the rat race. A warm interaction with your spouse is very important. Small gestures can help to boost others’ well-being. Use questions to spark conversation. Learn to ask good questions and probe. In general, people love to talk about themselves. Be vulnerable and humble to gain another person’s trust. Talk about your fears in general. Friendship enables you to connect with one another. It is common to mirror another person’s body language. A good level of trust is required for friendships to thrive. Sharing problems with one another is a great way to strengthen relationships. Good relationships at work are very important for well-being.

Take a Break for Relationships. Lack of cohesion leads to poor work dynamics and work productivity. Relationship building is crucial for work productivity. Influence amongst friends is contagious and you can catch the bug very easily if you are not careful. Continue to create positive experiences and your well-being will be improved. Do not text on the phone too often when having conversations with friends. Do not ruin conversations by not paying attention to friends. Give friends your undivided attention. People can easily tell if you are not focused on them. Do not allow your mind to wander.

Put Experiences First. If you recall happy memories, that can help to create some form of happiness too. The anticipation of a vacation can bring happiness as well. Experience-oriented products lead to happiness. In the long while, material items fail to provide long-lived levels of happiness. In modern societies, too many people spend on material items. People who choose to buy experiences end up being more fulfilled. The key is how you spend your money. Plan ahead for your well-being. Try to plan for your vacation a few months down the road.

It turned out that looking forward to a vacation or event provided even more happiness than the event itself. Even the memory contributed more to long-term well-being than the actual experience. – Tom Rath

Avoid Flying Solo. There is too much emphasis on solo achievement. Events with others are treasured more than solo experiences. Humans are social creatures and keep a certain level of bonding to thrive. A relationship is not a zero-sum game. Others win more when you succeed. Pro-social incentives work better than individual incentives. Try to allow others to give more than they receive.

Build a Cumulative Advantage. Focus on others’ achievements rather than their weaknesses. High levels of confidence is linked to increased level of benefits. Learn to encourage others. Use your knowledge to motivate and bring out the best in others. Bring things to life in words. Find and develop talent in others. Use praise and recognition techniques to aid you.

Energy

Put Your Own Health First. People in the healthcare sector need to take care of their health more. Invest more time in your energy and health. Star performers who work long hours tend to experience burnout. If you want to thrive in the long term, focus on your health and energy above everything else. Use short-term thinking for better health. Find the most pragmatic solutions. Make sure to get some physical activity in the morning. Ensure a good night’s sleep. It is a good idea to tackle multiple elements of health at the same time. It is very important to have enough energy so that you will feel recharged.

Eat Your Way to a Better Day. The food you consume affects your energy levels. You can’t simply measure quality of food by calorie intake. Avoid fried food. If you eat the right foods, your energy will be increased in the long run. Learn to make every bite count. Modest intake of protein is good for health. Consuming protein increases dopamine, which decreases your craving for sweet food. Go for egg-whites, berries etc. Ideally, one should consume more protein and less carbohydrates. It is better to shop when you full as compared to when you are hungry. Put vegetables and fruits at eye level. The food you eat can affect your mood and work performance. Avoid too much fatty and processed food. Learn to make better dietary choices.

Start with the basics: Avoid fried foods. Eat few refined carbohydrates. Eliminate as much added sugar as possible. Build meals around vegetables. Substitute whole fruit for sweets. Drink more water, tea, and coffee instead of soda or other sweetened drinks. – Tom Rath

Learn to Walk Before You Run. The key is to be active every day. The human being is not built to sit down and lead a sedentary lifestyle. The more you sit, the less beneficial it is. Build as much movement as you can into your routine as possible. Walking increases your energy levels too. Avoid sitting and waiting for long periods. Small bursts of energy are good. Use a pedometer to measure how many steps you have taken per day. Set a target for a minimum number of steps per day. According to research, 10,000 steps per day is a good target. People who exercise tend to experience better moods. After exercise, people will get a 12-hour mood boost. Exercising in the morning will give you energy for the rest of your day. Start by incorporating some activity into your daily routine.

Sleep Longer to Achieve More. Sleep is not a waste of time. A lack of sleep affects your well-being, productivity and health. However, most people tend to sacrifice sleep at their own expense. Ideally, try to get 7 to 8 hours of sleep per night. Add an extra of sleep to your routine. Sleepless driving is extremely dangerous and should be avoided at all cost. Get a vaccine for the rhinovirus. You are more likely to catch a cold if you sleep little. A good night’s sleep has benefits on physiological health. Using a cell-phone late at night can affect sleep quality. Avoid noise and bright lights when close to sleeping hour.

Eat, Move and Sleep to De-Stress. Stress can decrease the length of telomeres. Always keep active and eat well. Keep stress levels from snowballing. Stress is cumulative in nature and can soon lead to chronic levels. Avoid inheriting stress from others. Be conscious of your words and avoid stressing others out.

Respond with Resiliency. React to a situation as a challenge and do not see it as being stressful. Reframe stressful situation as challenges instead. Humans are remarkably resilient. Control your responses and do not do anything rash. Smile through difficult tasks. Force yourself into a smile and move on.

Be Unstoppable by Alden M. Mills

The 8 Essential Actions to Succeed at Anything.

This book is written for my children. I was an ex-Navy SEAL. I loved my work back then. Often, before missions, we would all write letters to our loved ones in case we would not end the mission alive. I want this book to be a pick-me-up kind of thing. This book will inspire you to go for your dreams. The 8 actions are UPERSIST. I used the metaphor of a captain and a ship to build the idea in your head. ‘YOUR LIFE IS UP TO YOU. YOU DECIDE WHAT KIND OF LIFE TO LIVE!’ Do not give up on a dream. Why do you want that dream to come true? Your mind can be your worst enemy. Let your mind work by your side and guide you to where you want to be in future. Live your dreams.

Everyone is given a boat in town, Uptoyou. You can upgrade your boat as you grow up, but you have only 1 boat. Everyone needs to go through hard work to make their boat work. Tim and Ted had similar upbringings but later on in life, Tim had to work harder. Ted made everything look easy. Tim kept his plans to himself. Tim loved the challenge of his job while Ted found his work to be boring and not great enough for what he was destined to be. Tim listened to advice from the older captains whereas Ted didn’t feel he needed any. Tim started beating Ted in racing but he didn’t tell anyone about it. Tim was given more difficult tasks by his boss and he loved the work. On the other hand, Ted felt resentful and jealous. Later, when on a new course, Tim started to panic as he was in unchartered waters. Captain Bill came to Tim’s rescue when his boat stalled. Ted and his friends teased Tim over his incompetence. Later, Tim saw the move magnificent ship that passed him. It was labelled ‘Persistence’. The ship’s captain started talking to Tim. They agreed to meet and have dinner together. Peter admitted that he used to have the same boat as Tim. Peter allowed Tim to tour his magnificent ship. Captain Peter definitely spent a lifetime improving his ship. Peter revealed that he ran aground many times before finally mustering the courage to leave the bay. Later, a man at the Shack embraced Peter. It was Jack, the owner of the clam shack. Peter was in town because he wanted to improve his ship. Peter explained that Jack loved his job and that his passion was infectious. Peter called himself a master and commander, someone who chartered his own path in life. Many people want to be a master and commander, but few succeed. Peter gave some advice Is it a nice to have or must have? Sacrifice is definitely a must. Tim went back to think through it and see whether he would really want the code.

The most important thing about running aground is making sure you understand why you ran aground. When you understand the ‘why’, then you’ll figure out the ‘way’ not to do it again – at least on that particular portion of your course. – Captain Peter

You won’t lose all of your friends, just the ones that aren’t your true friends. You’ll be quite lonely a bit, you’ll feel lost, get scared, be bone tired, doubt yourself. You might even cry yourself to sleep once or twice. You’ll fail many more times than you’ll ever succeed, and sometimes you won’t even know when you’ve succeeded. The code isn’t for everyone though. – Captain Peter

Understand the Why. Tim couldn’t figure out what he wanted to sacrifice or give up. What if your work could make a difference? What if you have a purpose? Chart your own course and do not help others fulfil their dreams. Peter was scuba diving to check on the new propellers that were installed on the ship. Learn to trust and verify. Peter was in extremely good shape and was very energetic. Not everyone is willing to work hard to get stuff done. Peter said he wanted to live purposefully and be able to chart his own course in life. It was all courage having the courage to follow your own courses. Dream the things you want to dream about. Peter advised Peter to learn to dream big. Our brain is always filled with limitations already and it is hard to overcome them. You must learn to dream big. Everyone has two limitations in life, your ability to dream and the ability to pursue those dreams. You decide what your limitations are. Ask ‘What If’ questions. Understand the why. Make your time count. Time is the only thing you have. Understand your true ‘why!’ You must find a ‘why’ to die for. Sacrifice everything to go for your dream. If you don’t have a strong enough reason, you will fumble. When the going gets tough, you will start to question your purpose, whether the sacrifice is worth it etc. This is when you will need a strong why. Don’t venture out if you do not know your why. In life, everything is up to you. You are the master of your fate. Achieve pebble goals first. Create an outcome account. On the left, list down the (+) of your goal and on your right the (-) if you were not be able to achieve your goal. The Outcome account will make you unstoppable. For example, for a Navy Seal a (+) could be: I would do things few people in the country ever get to do; for a (-), it could be: It would mean I had failed at something I believed I could do.

The problem is most people don’t allow themselves time to dream. They don’t ask the ‘what’ questions. Great dreams come from great questions. The better the questions, the more exciting the dreams! – Captain Peter

Most people think they know why they want to do something, but they give up before they accomplish their dream. – Captain Peter

Plan in 3 Dimensions. A lot of people do not plan and they just dive head in. Peter said he used to that when he was young until his boat ran out of gas half-way. Learn from your failures and recover from them. It’s a lesson learned. Embrace your FAILURES. The only failures are the ones you learn nothing from. Failing is a part and parcel of life. Having a plan will show you what works and what doesn’t. There will be no one to guide you. A linear plan wouldn’t work at sea. You need to consider all possibilities and have a contingency plan. However, your plan is not fool-proof and has to be edited along the way. Planning helps prepare you for the unexpected. Fortune favors the prepared. Planning is the key for mission success in the Navy. Not planning will cause you to lose your life. Define your goal and write it down and read it every day. Divide your goal. Do it daily. ‘What action can I take towards my goal today?’ Passion can only take you so far. You need to find the purpose in life. The key for success is always to do your best at the next task at hand. Focus on your daily progress. Make progress and work on your goal every day. ‘Do it daily’.

To prepare, one must first plan. The better you plan, the better you can prepare; the better you prepare, the better your chances of success. – Captain Peter

Exercise to Execute. The main reason why plans don’t work is because they have not been tested. Your body obeys your brain. Every action is something which you can control. The problem is that most people neglect their bodies. If you do not exercise, your body will not listen to your brain. Exercise builds stamina and concentration, which you will need to fuel your goal. Exercise is one of your best mechanisms to prevent yourself from giving up. The fitter you are, the harder you can work to make your plan a reality. The second part of it is to do it DAILY. Get your heart pumping. It works. Exercise is like a miracle drug and it will also make you more attractive. This will be your secret weapon. It keeps your brain focussed and your attitude positive. Push ups also work out different muscles in your body. You can also do it anytime and anywhere. Exercise produces dopamine. When you get stuck at work, go exercise!

Exercise can help keep you going when you feel like giving up. I consider exercise part of executing a plan. I do it first thing every morning. It stokes my engine all day as I tackle the intricacies of executing my plans. – Captain Peter

No one has the time to exercise unless they make it a priority! – Captain Peter

I’ve found push-ups to be the single best exercise when I don’t have time for a row or run. Push-ups engage all the major muscle groups, and you can do them anytime, anywhere. In fact, I use them to help me to stay awake when I’m on watch late at night. – Captain Peter

Recognize Your Reason to Believe. Belief in yourself. Have confidence. Peter pulled out a stone which was smooth on one end and had the word ‘Kanji’ on it. It read ‘Before you can achieve, you must first believe.’ It was the relentless flow of a river that smoothens a stone. You must be like a river and continuously believe in yourself. Your small wins will give you the confidence required. Exercise can you the confidence you need to believe in yourself. Take control of your body first. Our beliefs have a huge impact on our actions. When you don’t have belief, you won’t succeed because you won’t be motivated to take action. What you believe can impact what you or cannot do. With belief you can be unstoppable. Never stop believing. Jacques was a brilliant chef. He was a perfectionist. With belief, you will never give up. Peter named his ship Persistence. Success comes from building the correct habits. You must make your goal visible. Persistence helped me endure through my Navy SEAL life. Focus on something which you belief that is absolutely true. Start from yourself.

Take control of your body and you’ll take control of your life. – Captain Peter

The more you believe in yourself, the harder you’ll try and, when that happens, you’ll learn there’s nothing you can’t do. – Captain Peter

Survey Your Habits. Identify the obstacles that are hindering you. Then modify them so that they won’t get in your way. For instance, these could be bad habits which you have. Bad habits can be re-programmed. For instance, Peter learnt to latch a hatch every time he went through it after learning from his previous mistakes. ‘The mother of perfection is repetition.’ Famous saying. If you have a bad habit, you need to keep correcting it and repeating the correct again. Build a habit of welcoming and facing adversity. Adversity is the best teacher around. Have the never stop learning attitude. Riding out a storm gives you a sense of accomplishment. Learn from adversity. Keep your mind open to new things. The most challenging tasks only happen in your mind and depends on your mindset. Having a positive mind set is very crucial. Be careful of unhealthy habits like drinking, smoking etc. Face your problems and be responsible for your actions. In SEAL training, Pool Comp was super tough and one needed to stay calm as the oxygen mask will be removed from you as part of the test for a short while. Keep practising until it doesn’t seem familiar to you anymore. Your actions when you were short of breath will determine whether you succeed or not. Training will teach you to think under pressure. Practise ACT – Aware, Concentrate, Take Control. Everything is up to you.

Improvise to Overcome Obstacles. Peter introduced the guy running the ship to Tim. He was Robert. Robert invented a new battery system. Peter actually thought of giving up on a battery system as he encountered multiple failures. He was not an engineer and a lot of money was spent on fixing the system. In the end, this project was handed over to Robert and Peter gave him moral support. Robert was motivated because he wanted the chance to help the crew of Persistence. You need to understand the ‘how’ as well. Robert had to experiment and create multiple prototypes before the breakthrough. Implement and adapt. NEGU – Never Ever Give Up. Sometimes, there will be a need to be flexible and to improvise. Never be satisfied and always look for ways to improve. Peter actually thought his chef, Jacques, and Robert the code as well. There is a place in this world for everyone. Don’t treat people as a servant. Rather, you want people to work for you. Improvising means doing things differently. In the Navy, not taking action can actually kill someone. Through a mistake, you will learn another way not to Do Something. The obstacles are there to stop the other people.

Implement an action, adapt to the result, and repeat until you’ve overcome the obstacle. Be like a river and find your path over, under, around, or through – always keep trying and don’t stop flowing. Your success will come from your ability to keep trying. – Captain Peter

You need a crew that’s great at everything you’re not good at, and you need to leave your ego on the pier and be open to accepting that you will not always have the right answer. You’ll need to learn to trust your crew. Then a funny thing will happen. – Captain Peter

Improvising is a habit like exercising and planning, and it takes time and practice to make it a habit. The ability to improvise is not a talent that you’re born with; it’s a mindset that you create for yourself… – Captain Peter

‘The scary thing about improvising is that you have no idea how your idea will turn out. That’s okay, no one does. But if you don’t try to improvise, your results are guaranteed: Nothing. – Captain Peter

Seek Expert Advice. 1) Understand that you will never be great at everything; 2) Understand your strengths and weaknesses; 3) Find people who are good at covering for your weaknesses. Turn your liabilities into strengths by seeking advice. Learn from those who have gone before you. Arrogance kills and please try to learn from others. Look for people who can help you on your goal. Put your pride aside.

Team Up! Peter would be giving Tim a final exam to see if he understood the code completely. Action 8 is about choosing tough challenges which will eventually reap benefits. The tougher it is, the more rewarding it will be. You need a team. It’s a never ending cycle as you groom your new team. Press on. NEGU. Learn how to overcome your obstacles. 1) Understand the why, and you’ll figure out the way; 2) Plan in 3 dimensions; 3) Exercise to execute; 4) Recognize your reason to believe; 5) Survey your habits; 6) Improvise to overcome any obstacle; 7) Seek expert advice; 8) Team Up. Your ‘Why’ is the most crucial if you want others to join you on this.

Psychology Quotes 1 to 50

1. ‘Most giving is, as economists call it, impure altruism or warm-glow altruism. You give not only because you want to help but because it makes you look good, or feel good, or perhaps feel less bad.’ Steven D. Levitt & Stephen J. Dubner
2. ‘Don’t compare your beginning to someone else’s middle.’ Jon Acuff
3. ‘A man who tries to carry a cat home by its tail will learn a lesson that can be learned in no other way.’ Mark Twain
4. ‘Enjoyment appears at the boundary between boredom and anxiety, when the challenges are just balanced with the person’s capacity to act.’ – Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi
5. “Being human always points, and is directed, to something or someone, other than oneself — be it a meaning to fulfill or another human being to encounter. The more one forgets himself — by giving himself to a cause to serve or another person to love — the more human he is.” Viktor Frankl
6. “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing, the last of the human freedoms — to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” Viktor Frankl
7. ‘I discovered early on that people don’t buy from me because they understand what I’m selling. They buy because they feel understood.’ Jon Berghoff, a salesman of knives
8. ‘Introverts are offered keys to private gardens full of riches. To possess such a key is to tumble like Alice down her rabbit hole. She didn’t choose to go to Wonderland – but she made of it an adventure that was fresh and very much her by own. Lewis Carroll was an introvert, too, by the way. Without him, there would be no Alice in Wonderland. And by now, this shouldn’t surprise us.’ Susan Cain
9. ‘We have two ears and one mouth and we should use them proportionately. I believe that’s what makes someone really good at selling or consulting – the number-one thing is they’ve got to really listen well.’ Jon Berghoff, a salesperson of knives
10. ‘In a gentle way, you can shake the world.’ Mahatma Gandhi
11. ‘For far too long, those who are naturally quiet, serious or sensitive have been overlooked. The loudest have taken over – even if they have nothing to say. It’s time for everyone to listen. It’s time to harness the power of introverts.’ Susan Cain
12. ‘How you are today in the classroom is how you will be at work. I was a pleaser. If you will do anything for an A, then you will do anything for your boss.’ Justin Paperny
13. ‘Madness is the exception in individuals but the rule in groups.’ Friedrich Nietzsche
14. ‘When you are a teenager, or in college, you’re always re-examining your life. But when most people graduate, they stop doing that and I wonder why. Is it that it gets too draining to keep questioning your life?’ Frank Partnoy
15. ‘Like all workplace gossip, the fact that everyone knows what is going on turns out to be part of the problem. Talking about the problem feels like action – but it isn’t.’ Margaret Heffernan
16. ‘How in the hell could a man enjoy being awakened at 6:30am by an alarm clock, leap out of bed, dress, force-feed, shit, piss, brush teeth and hair, and fight traffic to get a place where essentially you made lots of money for somebody else and were asked to be grateful for that opportunity to do so?’ Charles Bukowski
17. ‘The most difficult phase of your life is not when no one understands you. It is when you don’t understand yourself.’ Anonymous
18. ‘That we will fight so hard to protect our self-esteem is a universal. It doesn’t matter how successful or wealthy people are. They all need to feel that they’re good people, even – or especially – when they’re bad.’ Margaret Heffernan
19. ‘Not knowing, that’s fine. Ignorance is easy. Knowing can be hard but at least it is real, it is the truth. The worst is when you don’t want to know – because then it must be something very bad. Otherwise you wouldn’t have so much difficulty knowing.’ Gitta Sereny
20. ‘All greatness in this world consists largely of mental self-control…what we call the life of a man consists simply of the stream of consciousness, of the succession of images which he allows to come before his mind…It is the power to so direct and choose our stream of consciousness as to form our character into whatever we desire.’ Irving Fisher
21. ‘Anything one does every day is important and imposing and anywhere one lives is interesting and beautiful.’ Gertude Stein
22. ‘Among our structurally closest analogues-the primates-the male does not fear the female. Heavy with young, making her way laboriously along, she fends for herself. He may fight to protect her or to possess her, but he does not nurture her.’ Margaret Mead
23. ‘People used to look out on the playground and say that the boys were playing soccer and the girls were doing nothing. But the girls weren’t doing nothing – They were talking. They were talking about the world to one another. And they became very expert about that in a way the boys did not.’ Carol Gilligan
24. ‘How do you make someone want something? You give it value. You show that others like it. You make it scarce. And you make them work for it.’ David DeAngelo.
25. ‘Happiness, knowledge, not in another place, but this place, not for another hour, but this hour.’ Walt Whitman
26. ‘Even the monkey, in his mother’s eyes, is an antelope.’ Arabic saying
27. ‘Toothbrush theory –> everybody wants a toothbrush, everyone needs one, everyone has one, but no one wants to use anyone else’s’ Dan Ariely
28. ‘The sequence in which we observe characteristics of a person is often determined by chance. Sequence matters, however, because of the halo effect increases the weight of first impressions, sometimes to the point that subsequent information is mostly wasted.’ Daniel Kahneman
29. ‘The first problem for all of us, men and women, is not to learn, but to unlearn.’ Gloria Steinem
30. “‘Flow’ is a state of effortless concentration so deep that people lose their sense of time, of themselves and of their problems. It is an optimal experience.” Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi
31. “Ask yourself if you are happy and you cease to be so.” John Stuart Mill
32. ‘Do I like it? Do I hate it? How strongly do I feel about it? In many domains of life, people form opinions and make choices that directly express their feelings and their basic tendency to approach or avoid, often without knowing that they are doing so.’ Paul Slovic
33. ‘To the untrained eye, randomness appears as regularity or tendency to cluster.’ William Feller, a statistician.
34. ‘Our mind automatically evaluates situations as being good or bad, whether to stay or to flee from it etc. In the case of meeting a stranger, how dominant, trustworthy he/she is.’
35. ‘It is the consistency of the information that matters for a good story, not its completeness. Indeed, you will always find that knowing little makes it easier to fit everything you know into a coherent pattern.’ Daniel Kahneman
36. ‘A person watching a two second silent video clip of a teacher he has never met will reach conclusions about how good that teacher is that are very similar to those of a student who sits in the teacher’s class for an entire semester.’ Malcolm Gladwell
37. ‘A general “law of least efforts” applies to cognitive as well as physical exertion. The law asserts that if there are several ways of achieving the same goal, people will eventually gravitate to the least demanding course of action. In the economy of action, effort is a cost, and the acquisition of skill is driven by the balance of benefits and costs. Laziness is built deep into our nature’ Daniel Kahneman.
38. ‘For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin-real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be got through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life.’ Alfred D’ Souza
39. ‘…But the truth is life is about producing failure. We only progress through a series of regulated errors. Every move is a partial failure to be corrected by the next one. Think of it as walking. You shift your weight off balance with every step, and then you throw your other leg forward to compensate.’ Peter Drucker
40. ‘All of us, from cradle to grave, are happiest when life is organized as a series of excursions, long or short, from the secure base provided by our attachment figures.’ John Bowlby
41. ‘The unconscious is impulsive, emotional, sensitive, and unpredictable. It has its shortcomings. It needs supervision. But it can be brilliant. It’s capable of processing blizzards of data and making daring creative leaps. Most of all, it’s all wonderfully gregarious’. (Brooks, 2011)
42. ‘Dogs are really interested in humans. Interested to the point of obsession. To a dog, you are a giant walking tennis ball.’ anthropologist Brian Hare
43. ‘5 ways to buy happiness: 1) Buy experiences; 2) Make it a treat; 3) Buy time; 4) Pay now, consume later (example vacations/holidays); 5) Invest in others’ from the book, Happy Money: The Science of Smarter Spending by Elizabeth Dunn and Michael Norton
44. ‘Every time you do an activity, or have a thought, you are changing a piece of yourself into something slightly different than it was before. Every hour you spend with others, you become more like the people around you.’ David Brooks
45. ‘To pathological gamblers, near misses looked like wins…But to a non-pathological gambler, a near miss was like a loss. People without a gambling problem were better at recognizing that a near miss means you still lose.’ Reza Habib
46. ‘Humans’ weak spot: we don’t notice small, gradual changes. A magician can make your watch vanish because, when he presses on one part of your body, you don’t notice the lighter touch on your wrist as he relieves you of your Rolex.’ Rolf Dobelli
47. ‘In conclusion: the typical response to scarcity is a lapse in clear thinking. Assess products and services solely on the basis of their price and benefits. It should be of no importance if an item is disappearing fast.’ Rolf Dobelli, on the scarcity error
48. ‘So, if you are a salesperson, make buyers think you like them, even if this means outright flattery. And if you are a consumer, always judge a product independent of who is selling it. Banish the salespeople from your mind, or rather, pretend you don’t like them.’ Rolf Dobelli (The Art of Thinking Clearly)
49. ‘Hierarchy of needs, in ascending order: 1) physiological/biological needs, 2) safety needs, 3) love, affection, and belongingness/social needs, 4) esteem, and 5) self-actualization.’ Abraham Maslow (Which level are you at? Haha)
50. ‘What you master in one area is difficult to transfer to another. Especially daunting is the transfer from academia to real life – from the theoretically sound to the practically possible. Book smarts doesn’t transfer to street smarts easily.’ Rolf Dobelli (The Art of Thinking Clearly)

Motivational Quotes 101 – 150

101. ‘Don’t wish away the week to get to the weekend, you end up wishing away your entire life that way. If you dislike your job so much that you do wish away they week then you need to find something else to do. This is not a call to go in on Monday and scream “I quit” but instead start working on a plan to make a change even if it takes months or years. You will eventually get to where you want to be and even just the process of getting there can relieve whatever negative feelings you take from the job you are trying to change.’ (extracted from a blog)

102. ‘People are more likely to take up an exercise routine if they set a cue, like running right after getting home from work; at a specific time of the day etc and rewarding themselves like watching a TV show, surfing the net, eating comfort food etc.’ Charles Duhigg (The Power of Habit)

103. ‘Attempts to give up snacking will often fail unless there’s a new routine to satisfy old cues and reward urges. A smoker usually can’t quit unless he finds some activity to replace cigarettes when his nicotine craving is triggered.’ Charles Duhigg (The Power of Habit)

104. ‘It wasn’t God that mattered. It was belief itself that made a difference. Once people learned how to believe in something, that skill started spilling to other parts of their lives, until they started believing they could change.’ Charles Duhigg, on how to overcome stressful events and bad habits

105. ‘If you want to do something that requires willpower – like going for a run after work – you have to conserve your willpower muscle during the day. If you use up too much of it at work, all the strength will be gone by the time you get home.’ Mark Muraven

106. ‘I’ve been really lucky, and I really, genuinely believe that if you tell people that they have what it takes to succeed, they’ll prove you right.’ Howard Schultz, founder of Starbucks

107. ‘The motto I have always lived by in life is to be passionate in whatever you do – don’t do things half-heartedly. Passion will be the fuel to carry you through and help you overcome most of the challenges you will face in life’s journey, be it in work, family or other areas. Learn to enjoy and smell the roses along life’s journey.’ Audit Partner

108. ‘If you are seeking a partner, never go out in the company of your supermodel friends. People will find you less attractive than you really are. Go alone or, better yet, take two ugly friends.’ Rolf Dobelli

109. ‘That’s why signing kids up for piano lessons or sports are so important. It has nothing to do with creating a good musician or a 5 year old soccer star. When you learn to force yourself to practice for an hour or run fifteen laps, you start building self-regulatory strength (self discipline).’ Todd Heatherton

110. ‘But every bad habit, no matter its complexity, is malleable. The most addicted alcoholics can become sober. The most dysfunctional companies can transform themselves. A high school dropout can become a successful manager.’ Charles Duhigg

111. ‘1) Avoid negative things that you cannot grow accustomed to, such as commuting, noise, stress etc 2) Material items only provide short-term happiness 3) Aim for as much free time and autonomy as possible, since long-lasting positive effects generally come from what you actively do. Follow your passions even if you must forfeit a portion of your income for them. Invest in friendships.’ Rolf Dobelli, on improving happiness (The Art of Thinking Clearly)

112. ‘So, find out where your circle of competence is. Get a clear grasp of it. Hint: it’s smaller than you think. If you face a consequential decision outside that circle, apply the hard, slow, rational thinking. For everything else, give your intuition free rein.’ Rolf Dobelli

113. ‘Kick the habit of reading news – completely. Instead, read long background articles and books. Yes, nothing beats books for understanding the world.’ Rolf Dobelli

114. ‘Nobody loves you more than you can love yourself. Because only you know yourself best.’ George Panait (Esplanade Director)

115. ‘Deal with expectations more cautiously. Raise expectations for yourself and for the people you love. This increases motivation. At the same time, lower expectations for things you cannot control – for example, the stock market.’ Rolf Dobelli

116. ‘My message to students is that if you want to become an entrepreneur and save the world, definitely don’t skip college. But go to a school that you can afford. You’ll be freed from the chains of debt and succeed on your own ambition and merit.’ Vivek Wadhwa

117. “There are moments when one has to choose between living one’s own life, fully, entirely, completely – or dragging out some false, shallow, degrading existence that the world in its hypocrisy demands. You have that moment now. Choose!”  Oscar Wilde

118. ‘You are the average of the five people you associate with most, so do not underestimate the effects of your pessimistic, unambitious, or disorganized friends. If someone isn’t making you stronger, they’re making you weaker.’ Timothy Ferriss

119. ‘If clouds are blocking the sun, there will always be a silver lining that reminds me to keep on trying…most people lose the ability to see silver linings even though they are always there above us.’ Matthew Quick

120. ‘Locate your shortcomings and find suitable knowledge and methodologies to balance them. It takes about a year to internalize the most important ideas of a new field, and it’s worth it: your pocketknife will be bigger and more versatile, and your thoughts sharper.’ Rolf Dobelli

121. ‘In order to be irreplaceable, one must always be different.’ Coco Chanel

122. ‘Your preparation for the real world is not in the answers you’ve learned, but in the questions you’ve learned how to ask yourself.’ Bill Watterson

123. ‘We all have different desires and needs, but if we don’t discover what we want from ourselves and what we stand for, we will live passively and unfulfilled. Sooner or later, we are all asked to compromise ourselves and the things we care about.’ Bill Watterson

124. ‘Drawing comic strips for five years without pay drove home the point that the fun of cartooning wasn’t in the money; it was in the work. This turned out to be an important realization when my break finally came.’ Bill Watterson

125. ‘It was a rude shock to see just how empty and robotic life can be when you don’t care about what you’re doing, and the only reason you’re there is to pay the bills.’ Bill Watterson

126. ‘A playful mind is inquisitive, and learning is fun. If you indulge your natural curiosity and retain a sense of fun in new experience, I think you’ll find it functions as a sort of shock absorber for the bumpy road ahead.’ Bill Watterson

127. ‘Our idea of relaxing is all too often to plop down in front of the television set and let its pandering idiocy liquefy our brains. Shutting off the thought process is not rejuvenating; the mind is like a car battery-it recharges by running.’ Bill Watterson

128. ‘My fondest memories of college are times like these, where things were done out of some inexplicable inner imperative, rather than because the work was demanded. It’s surprising how hard we’ll work when the work is done just for ourselves.’ Bill Watterson

129. ‘Creating a life that reflects your values and satisfies your soul is a rare achievement. In a culture that relentlessly promotes avarice and excess as the good life, a person happy doing his own work is usually considered an eccentric, if not a subversive. Ambition is only understood if it’s to rise to the top of some imaginary ladder of success.’ Bill Watterson

130. ‘Someone who takes an undemanding job because it affords him the time to pursue other interests and activities is considered a flake. A person who abandons a career in order to stay home and raise children is considered not to be living up to his potential – As if a job title and salary are the sole measure of human worth.’ Bill Watterson

131. ‘You’ll be told in a hundred ways, some subtle and some not, to keep climbing and never be satisfied with where you are, who you are and what you’re doing. There are a million ways to sell yourself out, and I guarantee you’ll hear about them. To invent your own life’s meaning is not easy, but it’s still allowed, and I think you’ll be happier for the trouble.’ Bill Watterson

132. ‘Many of you will be going on to law school, business school, medical school, or other graduate work, and you can expect the kind of starting salary that, with luck, will allow you to pay off your own tuition debts within your own lifetime…But having an enviable career is one thing, and being a happy person is another.’ Bill Watterson

133. ‘We define ourselves by our actions. With each decision, we tell ourselves and the world who we are. Think about what you want out of this life, and recognize that there are many kinds of success.’ Bill Watterson

134. ‘I realise now I don’t need to be like anyone else. The truth to my value is not determined on how I look, how smart I am, or how many friends I have, I need to be the best me that I can be.’ Nick Vujicic

135. ‘It’s worth recognizing that there is no such thing as an overnight success. You will do well to cultivate the resources in yourself that bring you happiness outside of success or failure. The truth is, most of us discover where we are headed when we arrive.’ Bill Watterson

136. ‘You may be surprised to find how quickly daily routine and the demands of “just getting by:” absorb your waking hours. You may be surprised matters of habit rather than thought and inquiry. You may be surprised to find how quickly you start to see your life in terms of other people’s expectations rather than issues…’ Bill Watterson

137. ‘Whether it’s working for a promotion, studying to further your education, training for a marathon, or anything else that requires actual commitment, it’s sexy. Maybe it indicates responsibility. Maybe it makes you seem like you have higher standards…’ Jessica Dopkiss

138. ‘Ignore everyone else. Other people’s grass seeming greener is no new concept, but in today’s image crafting world, other people’s grass looks like a glorious meadow. The truth is that everyone else is just as indecisive, self-doubting, and frustrated as you are, and if you just do your thing, you’ll never have any reason to envy others.’

139. ‘Stop thinking that you’re special. The fact is, right now, you’re not special. You’re another completely inexperienced young person who doesn’t have all that much to offer yet. You can become special by working really hard for a long time.’

140. ‘Stay wildly ambitious. The current world is bubbling with opportunity for an ambitious person to find flowery, fulfilling success. The specific direction may be unclear, but it’ll work itself out—just dive in somewhere.’

141. ‘I will hazard a prediction. When you are 80 years old, and in a quiet moment of reflection narrating for only yourself the most personal version of your life story, the telling that will be most compact and meaningful will be the series of choices you have made. In the end, we are our choices. Build yourself a great story. Thank you and good luck!’ Jeff Bezos, during a speech to graduating students

142. ‘It’s the only way I know in football: work hard, believe in what you are doing, believe in each other, be critical inside to try and resolve things inside our group, stick together and try and get a result.’ Jose Mourinho

143. ‘Find your niche, find what you are good at, and focus on that. And be a good person along the way – if you try to take shortcuts it will just come back and haunt you.’ Thomas Flohr (founder of VistaJet)

144. ‘Stop looking at social media websites, and instead work out what contribution you can make to the world, and go and do it.’ Thomas Flohr (Founder of VistaJet)

145. “‘How will you use your gifts? What choices will you make? Will inertia be your guide, or will you follow your passions? Will you follow dogma, or will you be original? Will you choose a life of ease, or a life of service and adventure? Will you wilt under criticism, or will you follow your convictions? Will you bluff it out when you’re wrong, or will you apologize? Will you guard your heart against rejection, or will you act when you fall in love? Will you play it safe, or will you be a little bit swashbuckling? When it’s tough, will you give up, or will you be relentless? Will you be a cynic, or will you be a builder? Will you be clever at the expense of others, or will you be kind?’ Jeff Bezos

146. ‘Many of you will soon enter the outside world and be somewhat taken aback. It will be far less efficient, far less fair, far less productive, and far more political than what you may have imagined it to be. There will be pessimism and cynicism everywhere. It is easy to succumb to this, to become cynical or negative yourself. If you do, you with the potential that you have, it would be a loss for yourself and for humanity.’ Salman Khan, founder of the Khan Academy

147. ‘Smile with your mouth, your eyes, your ears, your face, your body at every living thing you see. Be a source of energy and optimism. Surround yourself with people that make you better. Realize or even rationalize that the grass is truly greener on your side of the fence. Just the belief that it is becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.’ Salman Khan

148. ‘Make people feel that you care about them. And here’s, a well, a little secret, the best way to do this is to actually care about them. Make people feel that you are listening to them. Another little secret, the best way to do this is to actually listen.’ Salman Khan

149. ‘When you feel stressed, look up at the night sky and ponder the distance to the next star and the age of the universe. Think of all the other stressed sentient creatures from other star systems and galaxies looking out in the vastness of space in wonder and awe and take comfort in your shared experience.’ Salman Khan

150. ‘Remember that real success is maximizing your internally derived happiness. It will not come from external status or money or praise. It will come from a feeling of contribution. A feeling that you are using your gifts in the best way possible.’ Salman Khan

 

How Will You Measure Your Life by Clayton Christensen

If you are stuck in a corporate job and you feel unhappy, please try and understand why. Good theories help because you can predict better etc. Your theories will help you lead a more fulfilling life. Find happiness in your career too. Do not settle for poor jobs. Balance plans with opportunities. There are both hygiene and motivation factors in a job. Compensation is a hygiene factor and not intrinsic motivation. If you give someone who hates his job more money, he won’t hate it anymore but he won’t like it. Motivators include challenging work, recognition, responsibility, personal growth etc. Find a job you love. Know what makes you tick. Learn to try new stuff. Test the validity of your assumptions. Continue to experiment and keep your options open. Spend time on your strategy. What you say doesn’t matter, it’s what you do. Allocate resources to those that you value the most. Never neglect children and parents and friends. Find happiness in your relationships. Be patient and do not expand too quickly. Think long term. Sacrifice is very rewarding sometimes. Do not outsource your core capabilities. Expose your kids to both challenges and activities. Encourage them to stretch and not to be afraid of failure. Culture is very important. Choose something that matters to you. Stick to your principles 100% of the time, and not 98% of the time. You must have a purpose in life. Set goals in your life etc.